Manos: The Hands of Fate [Guest Writer] (1½ Stars)

As a change-up due to the number of movies I have enjoyed greatly, I now bring a truly monumental disaster in fimmaking history that I still enjoy greatly. Manos was a movie created in 1966 on a dare by an insurance salesman named Harold P. Warren and a screenwriter named Stirling Silliphant. Warren claimed making movies was simple, and that he could make one on his own. He then took $19,000 and went about organizing a cast and crew as well as a camera that could only hold 30 seconds of film, and did not record sound. It is claimed that he promised portions of the profits from the movie to cast and crew, owing about 300% once he was finished.

The story of the movie revolves around a family (The father naturally being played by Warren himself) on a vacation trip. After getting lost they find themselves at an odd house being taken care of by a man named Torgo (portrayed by John Reynolds). The character is supposed to be a satyr, though this is never brought up, and the prostetic goat legs that Reynolds wears for the role (which apparently caused much discomfort for him) are never shown properly, only the oversized thighs. The house is owned by "The Master", a mysterious man who worsips a being called Manos and who has sinister intentions for the doomed family.

Manos is an absolute mess of a film, using many long minutes of footage of farmlands for it's opening, a couple making out in a car seemingly for the duration of the film, and poorly-dubbed voices (most of which done by Warren and a couple others, making some dialogue sound like one person). The premiere was a disaster as well, the movie being ridiculed by the audience.

It eventually found a home on an episode of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 and, while being one of the worst movies they have ever had to go through (two of the characters on the show take a moment to apologise for how bad the movie is), it is one of the most beloved episodes by the fans. A fanbase gathered around Reynold's portrayal of Torgo, the only decent actor in the film, so much so that Torgo was portrayed by Mike Nelson (one of the writers and host in later seasons of the show) on a few occasions.

The original movie is almost unwatchable due to the horrible quality of the film, however there are copies of the MST3K version available through YouTube that make the film bearable, even when the characters on the show are at times unable to make fun of it due to it's lack of content. Definitly worth a viewing for those curious or brave enough to take on the challenge.

And yes, with the Spanish word Manos, the title literally translates to Hands: The Hands of Fate. Not exactly the best title, but it sticks with you.