Monday 8 January 2018

Virgin Psychics (5 Stars)


A cosmic event gives 16-year-old Yoshiro the power to read minds. He has to choose how to use his powers.

1) He can save the world.

2) He can have sex with as many girls as possible.

3) He can find his true love.

When you're a 16-year-old virgin who's never had a girlfriend that's not an easy choice to make. Speaking for myself, I would have been unsure whether to pick (2) or (3). I wouldn't want to save the world. Why me? I'd leave that up to people with greater powers.

Yoshiro soon meets with other super-powered individuals in his town. They've already decided what to do with their powers. His classmate Yosuke can teleport short distances, which he uses to enter the girls' changing room when they're undressing for sports. Terumitsu has telekinetic powers, which he uses to lift girls' skirts and look at their panties. Yabe has X-Ray vision, which he uses to look at girls' underwear. It looks like Yoshiro is the only one left to save the world. As Ben Parker once said, "With great power comes great horniness".


Maybe the research assistant Akiyama can help Yoshiro save the world. Her super power is that she can see the future of anyone who's staring at her breasts, so she dresses appropriately.


The police are puzzled when they find the school full of blow-up sex dolls. Is it a harmless prank? Is it the first step in an attempt to conquer the world? Could it be something even worse?


Only the evil lesbian genius Akiko knows the answer. Her power is to make copies of any girl she touches. The copies are her slaves and do whatever she wants.


The girls in Yoshiro's school line the way as he walks to his classroom. I know they mean well, but I'd be too intimidated to make the first step through the lines.

This film was made in 2015 by Sion Sono. It's a comedy, unlike his usual overbearingly serious dramas that are laced with religious themes. Nevertheless, I consider it to be one of his best films. It hasn't yet been released in English, but a German Blu-ray release is planned in April.

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