Tuesday 31 August 2021

Fast & Furious 2 (4 Stars)


The title of this film is "2 Fast 2 Furious", as you can see from the movie poster above. I've renamed it "Fast and Furious 2" for the sake of making my blogging easier. If you don't like it, go read someone else's blog.

The first film took place in Los Angeles. The second film takes place in Miami. Brian O'Connor has quit the police force after his problems of conscience at the end of the first film. Friendship is more important to him than doing his job. Now he makes money by participating in street races. They're illegal, but they're made possible by the American style of city construction. Roads are built either north-south or east-west, making cities a grid. This leads to long straight streets, ideal for racing, as long as they're blocked for traffic.

Brian is arrested and offered a pardon for his past crimes in exchange for helping the police with a case. A drug lord called Carter Verone works in Miami. The police know that he's a drug dealer, but they have no proof. They've been told by an undercover customs official that he intends to take his earnings to Argentina. They want to catch him red-handed, with his money, but they need Brian's help. He should be hired as Verone's driver to transport the many bags of money.


The only people who return from the first film are Brian O'Connor and his former boss in the police force, Agent Bilkins. The rest of the characters are new, but they're similar to the characters in the first film. They're a mix of speed freaks and glamorous women. For the first half of the film I thought it wasn't as good as the first film. The plot is infeasible, and there's even less character development. Towards the end I had to change my mind. The car chases won me over. Maybe it's wrong to call them "car chases". They're more of a sequence of high speed car crashes. Action can make up for a weak story.

Success Rate:  + 1.1

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

We can be heroes (4 Stars)


This is a Netflix original film which hasn't been released on disc, to the best of my knowledge. It's possible that it's been released in a country which doesn't have Netflix.

The film is clearly targeted at children. There are many details that are illogical or highly infeasible, but I should judge it through a child's eyes. My grandson Oliver sat watching it, and he was captivated. Normally he doesn't have the patience to sit through a full length film, but he couldn't look away for a moment. That means that it's only the third film he's ever watched after "Madagascar 2" and "Finding Nemo". I'll try to keep track of the films he watches as long as there are few enough for me to keep track of. There are other films that he began to watch but gave up before the end. I shan't include those in the list.

The American government has a group of super-heroes that are used to fight major crime and global disasters. Their children all have super powers, apart from Missy Moreno, whose father has control over magnetism. In an alien invasion all of the heroes are captured, so the children are hidden in an underground bunker for their safety. One of the children can foretell the future, and she warns them that the aliens will break into the bunker. The children break out of the bunker, led by Missy. She might not have any powers, but she's a natural leader. Or is leadership a super power?

The eleven children strike back at the alien invaders to free their parents and save the world.


Missy is the boss, with or without super powers.

As for the others, in alphabetical order:

A-Capella can move objects by singing.

Face Maker can change his face into any form.

Guppy can shape water into anything.

Noodles can stretch his arms, legs and neck. Not quite Mr. Fantastic.

Ojo can predict the future by drawing it. It's later revealed that she can also make things happen by drawing them.

Rewind and Fast Forward are twins who can roll back time a few minutes.

Slo-Mo moves in slow motion. That's a power?

Wheels sits in a wheelchair and has super intelligence. Plagiarism, anyone?

Wild Card has every possible super power, but only one at a time.

It's a fascinating film, which shows a different side of the talents of the director Robert Rodriguez. I strongly recommend it to anyone under the age of ten.

Spider-Man 2 (5 Stars)



I watched this film out of order in my Top 100 countdown. I know that I'm erratic, but in this case I had a good reason. Can you figure it out?

While watching "Spider-Man 2" today I tried to figure out why most fans like it more than the first film. Is it because there's more action? That's the only reason I can think of. In all other respects the first film is either equally good or better.

I like the way that the opening credits are scenes from the first film. It's a kind of summary of "Spider-Man", which was made two years earlier. It's not detailed enough to explain things to anyone who didn't see the first film, but the collection of photos is detailed enough to bring everyone else up to speed.


Peter Parker cradles his dying Uncle Ben in his arms.


Peter stands over Uncle Ben's grave.


The Kiss! This is one of the most iconic scenes in the first film, and there are references to it in the two other films in the trilogy. I praised Sam Raimi for sticking close to the original comics, but this kiss is something new that he's injected into the story. It's done so respectfully that I can't criticise him for the novel idea. It fits the film so well. The MTV Movie Awards have a prize for the Best Kiss. This category is sadly missing from the Academy Awards. Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst won the award in 2003. That's the least that they deserve. It wasn't just the Kiss of the Year, it's the Kiss of the Century.


But for all the passion, the Kiss wasn't enough to seal the relationship. Peter Parker walked away while Mary Jane looked on wistfully.


Now Peter can't get away from her. Wherever he goes, he sees her photo on the wall.


The villain of the second film is Otto Octavius, also known as Doctor Octopus. In the comics he's a purely evil character. "Spider-Man 2" portrays him as a complicated character who has noble motives, despite the crimes that he carries out to get what he wants. This makes for a more interesting film, I admit. In Stan Lee's early super-hero comics there was a sharp distinction between good and evil.


In the comics Aunt May disliked Spider-Man, but she praises his nobility as a hero in this film. That's unfortunate. It added to the poignancy of her relationship to her nephew that she thought Spider-Man was a villain. She even preferred Doctor Octopus to Spider-Man, as we see in Amazing Spider-Man #115.


And it almost comes as far as marriage in Amazing Spider-Man #131.


That's something that Sam Raimi let slip through his fingers. He couldn't have gone as far as a wedding in a two-hour film, but he could have spiced up the story with a budding romance between Aunt May and Doctor Octopus. Instead of this he shows Doctor Octopus already being married.

Despite all of this, it's still an excellent film. Maybe it should be a few places higher in my list, even if it's not as good as "Spider-Man".

Success Rate:  + 1.9

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

Monday 30 August 2021

The Green Knight (3 Stars)


This film is based on the epic poem  "Sir Gawain and the Green Knight". For those who know the poem, the story ends differently. That's the only spoiler I'm giving you.

Gawain is the nephew of King Arthur. He's not yet a knight, so he isn't allowed to sit at the Round Table, but he's favoured by the King and is allowed to sit next to his throne.

On Christmas Day a green-skinned giant rides into the throne room. He offers to play a friendly game. Someone must strike him with a weapon, either a light blow or a hard blow. Next year on Christmas Day the person must visit him, and the giant will hit him exactly the same way, either a light blow or a hard blow. None of the knights volunteer, so Gawain says he'll hit the giant. King Arthur gives Gawain Excalibur, and Gawain cuts the giant's head off. The giant picks up his head and puts it back on his shoulders. He thanks Gawain, tells him where he lives and leaves.

The story continues the next year in December. Gawain travels northwards, facing adventures on the way. There are repeated magical and supernatural challenges.


The film is nothing like I expected. I thought it would be full of action, but it's slow moving, without any fight scenes. I found the film dull, despite the excellent acting by Dev Patel.

Spider-Man (5 Stars)



I'm moving ever closer to the top place in the list of my favourite films. Many of my friends already know what my favourite film is, but I'll keep the rest of you in suspense.

In my opinion, this is the best film ever made based on Marvel heroes. Some people prefer the second Spider-Man film, but I don't understand why. It's a great film, I admit, but the first film is better. What I like about it is that it keeps so close to the original comics and the stories told by Stan Lee. There are a few minor changes, such as Peter Parker being older and his web being organic, but the film keeps very close to the spirit of the comics. The second film deviates more from the source material.


As I've said in my past reviews of this film, the casting choices are miraculous. The director Sam Raimi was meticulous in his choice of actors who looked as similar as possible to the comic book characters. Just look at J. K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson. Who else could have played the part?


Elizabeth Banks looks remarkably like Betty Brant. Compare her with the awful casting of Angourie Rice in the MCU Spider-Man films. Where's Sam Raimi when we need him?


Cliff Robertson and Rosemary Harris as Uncle Ben and Aunt May. Perfect! Who had the silly idea of casting Marisa Tomei as Aunt May in the new films? Sam Raimi would never have made a mistake like that.


And Kirsten Dunst as Mary Jane Watson? I would never have considered her because of her blond hair, but with red dye she looks perfect. She also has the light-headed party girl attitude that we know from the comics.

I could continue by going through every character in the film, but it's late and I don't have the energy. I should put it on my to-do list for the next time I watch the film. It really is a film that I should watch more often.

Success Rate:  + 3.9

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

Sunday 29 August 2021

The Wall (2012) (5 Stars)



Usually when I watch one of my favourite films, I tell my friends and readers that they must watch it. I tell them that it's a masterpiece that will knock them off their feet. I'm hesitant to do that with "The Wall". Yes, it's a masterpiece, but it's not a film for everyone. Many will find it boring, especially those who prefer action films. "The Wall" runs for two hours, and it just shows one woman walking around by herself, accompanied only by her collection of animals: a dog, two cats, a cow and a calf. There's no dialogue; the whole film is in voiceover. There's only one action scene, in which the woman finally meets a man, but the action is filmed very abstractly, so that we need the voiceover to know for certain what happens.


The only film that has any similarity to "The Wall" is "The Life of Pi". Both films show a person alone with animals, but the similarity is only on the surface. "The Life of Pi" is about a young man who's alone with God. The woman in "The Wall", who's never named, doesn't have God on her side. Maybe God has deserted her. Maybe God is dead. Whatever the truth, she's alone.

She's alone and she survives. No man and no God at her side.


I can relate to the woman. She's a writer, like me. She spends many hours sitting alone writing her journal. The difference is that I'm writing for my readers. The woman doesn't know if her words will ever be read.


The woman is powerful. She survives. At the end of the film she's lived alone for almost three years. I couldn't do that. I would be incapable of fending for myself in a harsh, lonely environment. I might even break down and kill myself. My fate would be like the man that she meets on the mountain pasture: I'd be lying dead, face down in the grass.


If you dare to watch something different to anything you've ever seen before, try "The Wall". There's nothing wrong with the dubbed English version. Voiceover is easy to dub, and in this case the lead actress, Martina Gedeck, has dubbed the dialogue herself. Maybe you won't like the film, but if you like it you'll want to watch it again and again. It's a glorious film about the supremacy of Woman. Woman doesn't need Man in order to survive. Man is a brute, less than an animal, so she kills him in order to continue her life in peace.

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

The Hitman's Bodyguard (3½ Stars)



Yes, I know. This is the third time in a row that I've published my Amazon Friday post on a Sunday. Maybe I should just give up and rename it Amazon Sunday. But if I do that, I probably won't write my post until Tuesday, so I'd better leave it as it is. I know my readers are laughing about me, especially the ones who know me personally.

I picked this film today because the film's sequel, "The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard", is currently in the cinemas. I don't know whether I want to watch it. Both films star Samuel L. Jackson, one of my favourite actors, but they also star Ryan Reynolds. He's very much hit or miss, as far as his films go. I have no doubts about his acting ability, but he's made a large number of bad films. He even jokingly acknowledges this in the mid-credits sequence of "Deadpool 2". He accepted film roles that he should have turned down, and he knows it.

In "The Hitman's Bodyguard" Ryan Reynolds plays Michael Bryce, an AAA certified professional bodyguard, who lost his reputation after one of his clients was killed on his watch. He can't get top profile jobs any more, until his ex-girlfriend asks him to guard Darius Kincaid, a professional hitman who has to give evidence at a war crimes tribunal in The Hague.

The two have met in the past, and Bryce looks down on Kincaid. He thinks he's better, because he saves people's lives while Kincaid kills people. It's not that simple. Bryce will guard anyone for money. He doesn't judge his clients. Kincaid is different. He has a conscience, so he only kills those who deserve to die, whether they're criminals or corrupt politicians.


On the plus side, the acting by the two main characters is superb. There are multiple car chases, including a spectacular five-minute chase involving cars, motorbikes and a speedboat through the centre of Amsterdam.

On the negative side, the plot is highly infeasible. It's difficult to take things seriously. The details of the history between the two men are unclear. Evidently Kincaid has attempted to kill Bryce 27 times in the past. Why? I thought Kincaid would only want to kill Bryce's clients.

Compared with Ryan Reynolds' other films, this is average. Not the worst, but far from the best. I still don't know whether I'll watch "The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard" in the cinema. I'll decide at short notice.

Success Rate:  + 3.9

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

Saturday 28 August 2021

Fast & Furious (4 Stars)


This is the film that kicked off the Fast & Furious franchise in 2001. So far there have been nine films in the series, alongside a spin-off film and an animated television series.

There's some confusion with the film titles, which I'll fix by heavy-handedly renaming the films. The actual title of this film is "The Fast and the Furious". Fair enough. But the fourth film in the series is called "Fast & Furious". The names of the other films, which I intend to watch slowly but surely, are also erratic, so I'll simply call this film "Fast & Furious" and number all the others 2 to 9, etc. That will at least put them in the right order in my alphabetical list of posts.


Now to the plot. A series of trucks have been stopped and robbed on the highway near Los Angeles. There's evidence that the culprits used specially modified racing cars. The police send an undercover cop, Brian O'Connor, to infiltrate the illegal racing car scene. He takes part in races on the streets of Los Angeles. Even though he doesn't win the races, he gains the respect of the reigning champion, Dominic Toretto. He also falls in love with Dominic's daughter, which is more of a problem than an advantage.


I admit that there are problems with the film. The character development is thin, to say the least. There are a couple of statements about Brian's past, but we don't know whether they're true or false information as an undercover cop. Dominic is the only well developed character, but we don't find out about him until late in the film.

These deficiencies are made up for by the action. As the title says, it's fast and furious.

Previously I've only watched the seventh film in the series. I recently bought a box set with the first eight films. It was so cheap that I couldn't resist. I'll watch all eight films eventually. I have a lot of other films that I want to watch first. It's not just my top films list, which is rapidly reaching completion. I have other films that I've scheduled for viewing from September onwards.

Success Rate:  + 3.5

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk
Order from Amazon.de

Friday 27 August 2021

Sky Sharks (5 Stars)


What do you want from a film? I like films with a well written story and good character development, preferably with a mix of action and romance. But if a film has Nazis, zombies and flying sharks, who cares about the rest? Those three ingredients are enough to make anyone happy.

Shortly before the end of World War Two a secret project was developed to create super soldiers to win the war. It was made possible to revive dead soldiers to fight as zombies, unquestioningly loyal and impervious to pain. Added to this, sharks were genetically modified to be used for them to fly through the sky. After decades frozen in the Arctic, they attack planes in the sky, the sharks eating anyone who falls out. The only hope against the Nazi zombies and their flying sharks is a reformed Nazi who's now living in America.

The film is ridiculous, but sublimely ridiculous. However silly the plot might seem, once you sit and watch the action you'll be swept away. One of the strong points is the music used. The mixture of heavy metal and 1980's electropop puts the viewer in the mood for the excessive gore.

The obvious comparison is "Iron Sky", but this is a much better film. I've been told that the film was made in a mixture of German and English, but the version I watched in the cinema today the English dialogue was dubbed into German. I can't wait to see the original version.

I don't know if "Sky Sharks" will be shown in cinemas outside of Germany, but I strongly recommend watching it on the big screen if you get a chance.

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk

Thursday 26 August 2021

Name of the Rose (4 Stars)


There was a lot of excitement about this film when it was released in 1986. As far as I know, it's been mostly forgotten. Am I right? Obviously, serious film fans like me still remember it, but how many people under the age of 40 have seen it or even know it exists? It's not on frequent television repeat, which is the way older films are usually remembered. Even if it's offered on a streaming service, it's unlikely to be noticed.

In 1327 delegates from the Franciscan and the Dominican monks arrive at an abbey in northern Italy to discuss the poverty of Christ. The debate runs to extremes, even asking whether Jesus owned the robe that he wore. Obviously, the main question is whether modern Christian factions are allowed to be wealthy. The Franciscans were – and still are? – ascetic monks, wearing simple clothes and eating simple meals, whereas the Dominican monks lived in luxury.

William of Baskerville is a highly revered Franciscan monk, despite being accused of pride in his own intellectual facilities. There are a series of suspicious deaths in the abbey. William is more interested in finding the murderer than in the theological debate itself.


A murder mystery set in the 14th Century? That's an original idea. The film is based on a novel with the same name by the Italian philosopher Umberto Eco. He said he was glad that the film encouraged people to buy his book, but he doubts many people managed to read it all. The book, which I haven't read, supposedly contains long theological debates which are absent in the film. He claims that they're too boring for typical cinema fans. That's possible. I felt tempted to buy the book myself to see if it's really so boring, but after 30 years I still haven't got round to it. Only €6.69 for the Kindle edition in Germany. I'm still tempted, but I might wait another 30 years. At the moment I'm reading "Bulldog Drummond" on my Kindle.

The themes in the film would make me laugh, if they weren't so tragic. A blind man is responsible for looking after one of the largest book collections on Earth. Torture is used to obtain confessions of heresy. A mute woman is asked to repent of her sins, and when she doesn't answer she's sentenced to be burnt at the stake.

I have the film on Blu-ray, supposedly remastered, but the picture quality is below average. Some older films have been better preserved than others. The film is still enjoyable and worth purchasing. It's currently out of print in most countries. I have the Swedish edition, which is available from Amazon.

Success Rate:  + 2.4

Wednesday 25 August 2021

Promising Young Woman (4 Stars)


Cassie is 30 years old and works in a coffee shop. She lives with her parents and has never had a boyfriend. By all accounts she's a failure in life. And yet, she used to go to a medical school. She was one of the best students, but she dropped out after two years. What happened to her?

It's all because of her best friend Nina. They grew up together, they went to school together, and they went to college together. One evening she got drunk at a party, and she was raped by one of their fellow students. Nobody believed her story. There were other party guests who saw everything, presumably all male, and they kept quiet. She dropped out of college and died a short time later, presumably suicide.

You'll notice that I've already used the word presumably twice. If I continued with a full plot summary I'd have to use the word many more times. There are lots of things that are hinted in the film, not explicitly stated. In the two cases above, it's easy to guess what happened. It's obvious. In later scenes it isn't so clear. That annoyed me.

But getting back to Cassie, what's she doing with her life? Every Friday she goes to a club and pretends to be drunk. She waits for a man to take her home. She keeps a log in her diary of whether the man takes advantage of her in her drunken state. She makes black and red marks in her diary, to show whether it was a good man or not. Presumably. If it's a bad man she reveals that she's still sober at the last moment.

By chance she finds out that Nina's rapist, now a successful doctor, is about to get married. She steps up her activities and prepares to take revenge on him and those closest to him.


I felt slightly disappointed after hearing all the praise heaped on the film. To me it seemed uneven. There are some very good scenes, whereas others are less convincing. Over the years she's gone to the houses of strange men, presumably hundreds of men, and nothing bad has ever happened to her. What are the chances of that? The film is an interesting new slant on rape'n'revenge thrillers, but its uniqueness is what makes it weaker.

"Promising Young Woman" has already been released on disc in Britain and America. Its cinema release in Germany has been delayed by the cinema lockdowns.

Order from Amazon.com
Order from Amazon.co.uk

Tuesday 24 August 2021

Supervixens (5 Stars)



There are films that are impossible to file under any one genre. Is "Supervixens" a road movie? Is it a comedy? Is it a political satire? Is it a fairy tale? Is it a sex film? Is it a neofeminist propaganda film?

It's all of them and more.

While anyone who sees the film for the first time might be shocked and confused, fans of Russ Meyer will laugh and say "It's typical Russ Meyer".

The opening credits are accompanied by the Nazi marching song, "Heil Hitler Dir". I wanted to quote the lyrics here, but they're so disgusting that I'm ashamed to post them on my blog. You can easily find them online if you search. Was Russ Meyer a Nazi? Far from it! He frequently spoke out against political extremism on both sides of the political spectrum. By using racist political imagery in his films, he was just acknowledging a fact. Racism exists. We all know that it's bad, but if we don't talk about it, it'll grow stronger.


The film's hero, if he can be called that, is Clint Ramsay. He's a poor, not too intelligent man, who lives somewhere in the South of the USA. "Supervixens" was filmed in Arizona, but it could be anywhere. Clint's curse is that he's irresistible to women. He does his best to fight them off, and he suffers as a result.


Clint works at a gas station owned by Martin Bormann, Hitler's former private secretary. As everyone who watches Russ Meyer's films knows, he survived the war and fled to America, where he became a respected citizen. In this film he's a lowly gas station owner, but in "Beneath the Valley of the Ultravixens" he's worked his way up to become the owner of a Christian radio station. In America anything is possible.


At least, that's the theory. Look at the town where they live. The houses look like they've been built in a scrap yard, surrounded by junk and poor farms. There might be an American dream, but this is the American nightmare.

People who take a quick glance at Russ Meyer's films see the naked women with large breasts and shrug them off as films that exploit women. The opposite is the case. The women are in control, and they use their nudity to get what they want. There are three archetypes in Russ Meyer's films, two male archetypes and one female archetype. The men fall into one of two categories.

The first type of man is weak and stupid, but sexually capable.

The second type of man is strong and stupid, but sexually impotent.

The women are all strong, intelligent and sexually demanding.

Women use the first type of men for their sexual pleasure. They ridicule the second type of men. In fact, they ridicule both groups. They demand more and more sex from a man, and when he's eventually worn out they laugh at him.


This is Clint's wife, Super Angel. Do you find the name strange? All the women in the film are called Super. It shows their position in the pecking order. Super Angel is fiercely jealous of Clint. She constantly suspects him of infidelity, even though he fights off women all the time. She's isn't faithful to him. She's quick to jump into bed with any man she likes. That's her privilege as a Super woman.


This is Super Lorna, tempting Clint at the gas station. She wants to drag him into the men's room, but luckily Martin Bormann drags Clint away. Nazis can be useful at times.


Back home, Clint and Super Angel get into a fight over his alleged infidelity. A neighbour calls the police. Along comes Sheriff Harry Sledge, who throws Clint in jail to cool down for a few hours. Super Angel wants Harry as a replacement for her husband, but she's disappointed. Harry belongs to the second type of men. When she laughs at his sexual inability, he kills her and frames Clint.


At the time of Super Angel's death, Clint was sitting in Super Haji's bar getting drunk. She could have given him an alibi, but she was angry with him because he'd refused to have sex with her. So Clint flees, hitchhiking across the USA towards the West. Everywhere he goes he meets Superwomen who want his body.


After turning down Super Cherry, she kicks Clint in the groin so hard that he's left lying unconscious at the roadside.


Clint is rescued by a farmer, but his wife Super Soul needs another man.


Clint flees from the farm and rents a room in a motel, where he's accosted by the motel owner's daughter, Super Eula.


Incidentally, this is her father. As Eddie said in "Jurassic Park: The Lost World", there's not much of a family resemblance.


On the run again, Clint finally arrives at Super Vixen's Oasis. Water in the desert. I told you it's a fairy tale! Until now he's resisted every woman who wanted him, but Super Vixen is different. She reminds him of his wife, which is hardly surprising, because she's played by the same actress, Shari Eubank.


"My name is Supervixen. My friends call me Vix".

Super Vixen gives Clint a job, and they become lovers. And they all lived happily ever after?

Not quite. I have to leave a few things open.

This is an absolutely brilliant film. It's not as culturally significant as "Faster Pussycat Kill Kill", but I still think it's Russ Meyer's best film. For unfathomable reasons it's been out of print in America and the UK for years. It can still be bought in Germany.