Wednesday, 22 May 2013

Silver (1 Star)

Have you ever watched a film and felt so empty afterwards that you feel you've just wasted 90 minutes of your life?

Jun Shirogane goes to America to take part in a karate competition. She wins first place. When she returns home to Japan she finds out that her whole family has been slaughtered by a gang called the Viper's Nest. An ex-lover hires her into a secret organisation that deals with criminals "outside of the law". He promises her a chance for revenge if she carries out other missions first. For her cover she becomes a professional wrestler and adopts the name Jun Silver.

Her first mission is to retrieve the client list and photos of a dominatrix who specialises in rich and famous customers. "I have yakuza bosses among my clients. It's hard being a dominatrix". After this she is contronted by Four (yes, that's his name), an assassin hired to kill her by the Viper's Nest. Four takes his job so seriously that he protects her from anyone else who is trying to kill her.

Let's stop there. I'm a glutton for punishment. I keep returning to films directed by Takashi Miike, hoping to enjoy them, but I never do. So many people praise him that I tell myself he must be good, but I'm disappointed every time. This film does everything wrong, but the worst part is the cliffhanger ending. It looks like the studio's budget ran out before the film was finished. It ends in the middle of a gun fight, and Jun doesn't even know who is attacking her. What sort of rubbish is that? This rates as one of the worst films I've ever seen.

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