Tuesday, 17 February 2015

Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead (3½ Stars)

This is another offering in the "Schoolgirls-versus-Zombies" genre. I have no idea how many films of this type have been made. I have about half a dozen in my DVD collection, but there must be at least 50 of them made in the last 10 years. There are many variations, but the key elements are that zombies are attacking, and they can only be stopped by pretty girls in school uniforms who kill them either with guns, swords or karate kicks. It's always Japanese schoolgirls, of course. This film genre hasn't yet spread to other countries.

Like all other Japanese schoolgirls, Maki wants to be a model, but she doesn't feel she has what it takes. She thinks she's too fat, although it's obvious to the viewer that she has a perfect body. She decides to go to the woods and look for tapeworms. If she swallows a tapeworm she will lose weight. The problem is that the worm she swallows isn't a tapeworm, it's a nekurogedoro, a parasite which grows in the person's stomach and finally eats the brain, turning the person into a zombie. An unfortunate side effect is excessive farting.

I think Maki looked better before she swallowed the worm. And why does her fart look like the Devil? That's the first time I've ever seen a film with demonic farts.

This is the most disgusting film I've ever seen. I wish Mary Whitehouse had lived long enough to see it. It has zombies climbing out of toilets and throwing shit. It has giant worms crawling out of people's butts, and in some cases they enter people through their butts. And then there are farts so powerful that they make people fly. The director is obviously trying to shock people, and it works. For the first half hour I felt so disgusted that I wanted to stop watching the film, but as it continued I grew numb and I couldn't stop laughing at each new atrocity.

I wonder if Naoi is talking about the shit-covered zombies or the film in general.

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