Dirndljagd am Wörthersee (1 Star)

This is an Austrian comedy made in 1984. The use of the word "Dirndl" in the title makes it sound like it's connected to the Bavarian erotic comedies of the 1970's, which I've been reviewing over the last two weeks. Nothing could be further from the truth. The film takes place in southern Austria, near the Wörthersee, far away from the Dirndl films which take place in the border area between Bavaria and Tirol (north-west Austria).

While watching the film today I was confused. I couldn't understand what it was about. What I mean is, I understood what was happening, but none of it made sense to me as a narrative. It starts with a couple having sex in a fitness centre after hours. Their clothes are stolen, so they have to leave naked. The man breaks into a villa, leaving the woman behind, but we never see her again. Someone comes home, so the man hides under the bed while a couple have sex on the bed above him. It turns out that the man on the bed is the women's lover, so he has to hide under the bed when the husband comes home. The two naked men under the bed shake hands and make friends. That's probably the only part of the film that I found at all funny.

The first man steals the only clothes he can find, a Dirndl outfit. He's arrested by a gay policeman. After being released he visits a doctor to get help with a problem. His penis is too long, so he wants part of it to be cut off. Huh? After this we don't see the man any more. The film is now about the doctor, who has a ridiculous stutter, picking up girls despite being fat and ugly.

I sympathise with stuttering. My father stuttered all his life. My younger son stuttered as a child and needed treatment into his teens. But the doctor's stutter is just stupid. He can only talk when he slaps himself on the back of his neck. It was so annoying that I had to stop watching. I took a short break, and I read a synopsis of the film on Wikipedia. That confused me even more. It was like it was another film. Wikipedia wrote about two men who weren't in the film, doing things that had no connection to what I'd see in the first half hour. After having half a glass of Sherry to strengthen my nerves, I continued with the film.

The doctor disappeared from the film, thankfully, and there were silly scenes about an actress and a prostitute who lived opposite one another and got mixed up because of their names, Eva and Evi. Eventually, the two men mentioned in Wikipedia were introduced, at the 55 minute mark.

What I find annoying is the film's structure. There's a certain logic to it, but I still find it frustrating. It goes like this:

Person A is the main character. Then he meets person B. Person A disappears from the film without explanation, and person B becomes the main character. Person B meets person C. Person B disappears from the film, and person C becomes the main character. And so on.

What's the director trying to say? I have no idea. Is it an experimental film or just a poorly written film? Probably both. The film is junk. I almost gave the film two stars (poor). The only thing in its favour is the occasional nudity, but there's not even enough nudity to make it worth watching. One star (awful) is the rating it deserves. There's no reason for anyone to watch this film.

I almost forgot to mention: the title means "Dirndl hunt on the Wörthersee", which makes no sense in the context of the film. In America it was called "Bring the little pigs", referring to a scene with a fancy dress ball where women dress up as pigs. Weird. Is this a local custom in southern Austria? I hope so, because if it isn't, the film is just being totally stupid.