Citizen Vigilante (3 Stars)

The Scandal

Over the last few weeks there's been a lot of talk about this film in the German press. It's the latest film by the infamous German director Uwe Boll. He's been complaining about the film being banned in Germany, although the authorities say it hasn't been banned, because Germany doesn't have censorship. So what's the truth?

In Germany films are given an age rating (0, 6, 12, 16 or 18) by the FSK (Freiwillige Selbstkontrolle), an independent organisation. All films that are distributed in Germany, whether in cinemas, on physical media or streaming platforms need an FSK rating. The FSK charges the film studios for the rating, based on the film length. It's common for films to be rated more than once. If a studio is unhappy with its rating, cuts can be made to get a lower rating, usually by re-editing or removing violent scenes.

If a film is denied an FSK rating, it can't be distributed in Germany at all, in cinemas, physical media or streaming. This is rarely done, usually in the case of extreme violence. Examples are "Rampage" (2009), "I spit on your grave" (2010) und "Maniac" (2012). In all these cases cuts were made to get an FSK 18 rating. That sounds suspiciously like a ban to me, but since it's carried out by a non-government organisation it doesn't count as a ban. They're arguing about words.

In all the cases of FSK denial, less than a dozen cases in the last 20 years, a compromise could be easily reached. It was always about violence. "Citizen Vigilante" is different. The violence isn't excessive. As Uwe Boll himself has said, it has less violence than "John Wick". "Citizen Vigilante" has been denied an FSK rating because of its political content. It allegedly incites people to violence against immigrants. Boll denies this, but nobody is listening to him.

The film won the attention of Elon Musk. He's long accused Germany of censorship, so when he heard about the film he posted it on his personal X account. It was only online for 48 hours, but that was long enough for copies to be made. Quiver Distribution, the company that has acquired the international distribution rights for the film, has aggressively ordered takedown notices for online copies. In all my years on the Internet I've never known any film be so aggressively protected.

The Film

The film was made in Zagreb, but the dialogue is in English. The on-screen text us that the film takes place in "Europe", but no attempt is made to hide street signs in Croatian. The film is about Michael Sanders, an American who's taking an extended vacation in the unnamed European city after leaving the US Army. He's inherited property from his recently deceased father. He's disturbed by the number of crimes being committed by illegal immigrants, so he decides to take the law into his own hands. He visits the victims of violent assaults and asks them, "What should be done with your assailants?" In every case the answer is that they should die. Sanders takes care of the executions with ruthless precision.

It's a far from perfect film. I would never have watched it if it hadn't been for the scandal.

The film could have been written better. We're thrown into the middle of a story. Michael Sanders is already active. Nobody knows who he is, but he's praised as a hero on social media. I would have preferred to see his development. If we'd seen his arrival from America and the steps that led to him becoming a vigilante, we could have more sympathy with him. As it is, he's an unstoppable force, like an inhuman Terminator.

There's no character arc. Sanders starts the film as a killer and remains a killer until the final credits. It would have been better to see him have problems that made him question what he was doing. Assuming he's a hero, or at best an anti-hero, we need to get under his skin. Uwe Boll has never been good on character development, but this is a film where it's essential.

I hesitated a long time before I rated the film. Maybe three stars is too generous. In its favour, the cinematography is excellent, but the screenplay is lacking. Boll has already promised a sequel for next year. I hope he can do it better.

Exte (5 Stars)

If you've seen Sion Sono's films, you'll know horror is rarely his main goal. Even when he's dealing with mass suicide, cults or psychological collapse, he's more interested in social satire, surrealism and existential questions than simple scares. That's what makes "Exte" such an oddity. It's the closest Sono has ever come to making a straight horror film.

The premise is gloriously bizarre. Hair removed from the body of a dead woman and used for hair extensions begins to grow and develop a murderous life of its own. It sounds ridiculous, and in less capable hands it would have been nothing more than an extended joke. Instead, Sono embraces the absurdity, mixing grisly body horror with moments of black comedy and genuine unease. The result is Japanese horror at its most eccentric, where beauty and revulsion become impossible to separate.

The film's outstanding star is Chiaki Kuriyama. She's best known for playing the deadly schoolgirl Gogo Yubari in "Kill Bill", but "Exte" is the film in which she delivers the finest performance of her career. As Yuko, a young hair stylist suddenly burdened with caring for her neglected niece while battling a supernatural nightmare, she's completely believable. She brings warmth, vulnerability and determination to a film that could easily have collapsed under its own outrageous concept. Even when giant masses of living hair are attacking people, she keeps the emotional core firmly grounded.

"Exte" may not have the spiritual depth of "Suicide Club", "Noriko's Dinner Table" or "Strange Circus", but that was never Sono's intention. He's having fun with horror conventions while still injecting enough eccentricity to remind you whose film you're watching. It's outrageous, inventive and frequently revolting, yet surprisingly heartfelt beneath the gore.

For fans of Japanese horror, "Exte" remains one of the strangest films of the 2000's and a reminder that even when Sion Sono sets out to make a conventional horror film, he can't resist making something wonderfully, gloriously weird.

Obsession (4 Stars)

I'd already seen this film in April as the opening film of the Stuttgart Nights Festival. I didn't intend to see it again, but one of my friends praised it so highly that I needed to go back and check if my four star rating is high enough. After careful consideration, I'm leaving my rating unchanged.

The film is about a shy boy called Bear who doesn't have the courage to approach a woman called Nikki that he's had a crush on for years. Honestly, he's so insecure that I feel like slapping him. But this isn't a fault that I find with the film. The world is full of insecure young men who're afraid to approach women.

Bear uses a mystical artefact called a One Wish Willow. After breaking it he can make a wish. His wish is for Nikki to love him more than anyone else in the world. Even when she comes on to him, Bear backs away, but she won't take No for an answer. We soon see that her love for Bear isn't healthy; it's an obsession. To take just one example, she refuses to let him talk to other women.

What disturbs me about the film is that Nikki does other strange things that have nothing to do with her obsessive love for Bear. For instance, she cooks his dead cat for him. That's just silly. If things like this had been omitted from the film I could have given it a five star rating.

Righting Wrongs (5 Stars)

If you've ever wondered whether Yuen Biao deserves to stand alongside Jackie Chan and Sammo Hung, "Righting Wrongs" is the answer. Corey Yuen's brutal vigilante thriller gives Biao the chance to prove he isn't just an incredible martial artist; he's arguably the greatest acrobat Hong Kong cinema has ever produced.

Like Jackie Chan, Biao performs every stunt himself, with astonishing speed and absolute commitment. He flips through windows, dives between moving vehicles, crashes through glass and launches himself into gravity-defying aerial manoeuvres that still look unbelievable today because they're real. There's no CGI, just breath-taking athleticism and fearless stunt work. His movements are so fluid that even the most dangerous sequences seem effortless.

Then there's Cynthia Rothrock, who more than holds her own. Rather than simply playing the token female action star, she's presented as an equal. Her crisp karate techniques perfectly complement Biao's acrobatic kung fu, creating one of Hong Kong cinema's greatest hero versus hero fights. Rothrock's kicks are lightning fast, her timing is impeccable and her screen presence is commanding. She also gets a spectacular showdown with Karen Sheperd, making this one of the rare 1980's action films where the women deliver some of the movie's best fights.

The plot, about a prosecutor driven to vigilantism after the legal system fails, is darker than most Hong Kong action films of the period and becomes increasingly ruthless as it builds towards its famously bleak finale. Comedy appears occasionally, but the film never loses its hard edge.

"Righting Wrongs" isn't remembered because of its story. It's remembered because it contains some of the finest martial arts choreography and practical stunt work ever filmed. Yuen Biao and Cynthia Rothrock perform at the very top of their game, creating an action classic that leaves modern productions looking tame.

Strange Circus (5 Stars)

If you go into "Strange Circus" expecting a straightforward horror film, prepare to have your mind thoroughly scrambled. This is the kind of film that makes you stop asking what's happening and start wondering whether any of it is happening at all.

Directed by Sion Sono, "Strange Circus" blurs the line between memory, fantasy and reality until it completely disappears. Abuse, murder, fiction and trauma become so tangled together that every scene makes you question the last one. Are you watching the truth, a novel, or someone's desperate attempt to escape the truth? The film never gives you an easy answer.

That's what makes it so fascinating.

The dreamlike visuals, grotesque circus imagery and haunting performances create an atmosphere that's both beautiful and deeply unsettling. Every time you think you've worked the story out, Sono quietly suggests you've been fooled.

"Strange Circus" isn't interested in explaining itself. It wants you to leave with questions rather than answers. Days later, you'll probably still be wondering what was real... and whether that question was ever the right one to ask.

In a recent interview Sion Sono claims this is one of his favourite films. It was made in 2005, when he was still developing his style. His previous films, especially "Suicide Club", had established him as a creator of unsettling horror films. "Strange Circus" continues in this vein, but it adds eroticism to the mix in a way that disgusts more than arouses. It's the sort of film that many people will turn off within the first half hour.

At the time Sono made the film he was dating a woman who owned a shop that sold BDSM outfits. Most of the non-speaking extras are the shop's customers, giving the film a bizarre realism.

Bridesmaids over the Edge (3½ Stars)

This short film is included as an extra feature on the Blu-ray release of "Bikini Time Machine", renamed "Swinging Bachelorettes". It follows a similar patten to "Baby Doll Strippers", but it's a better film because the actresses are better. They're actresses that we know from the Medina films. Nicole Sheridan stars as the bride-to-be.

And Christine Nguyen stars as one of the bridesmaids. Wow! What a beauty!

As for the plot... it's the day before Nicole's wedding. She's invited her two bridesmaids Christine and Jassie for a hen party. I refuse to use the word bachelorette, except in the film's title. The film starts with Nicole asking the other women questions, such as the most daring place they've ever had sex, and how they celebrated their own hen parties. Unlike "Baby Doll Strippers", the answers don't seem as natural and were probably scripted.

Then another woman arrives, Brooke, who's been hired as a stripper. She performs for Nicole and the bridesmaids. Then they play a game of Truth or Dare.

Interestingly, "Bridesmaids over the Edge" uses the same musical leitmotifs as the Medina and McKendrick films. The director is listed as Carter Blanche, obviously a fake name. Don't look for a plot or any deep significant meaning in the film; it's just an excuse for sexual titillation.

Bikini Time Machine (4 Stars)

This is the third film from the Medina Collection that Fred Olen Ray has released on Blu-ray this year. That makes me happy, because I want to purchase all 32 films on Blu-ray. Many of the older films look fuzzy on DVD. I'm also happy to see any film starring Jenna Presley, even though she only has a small role at the beginning of the film.

The film is about a university professor who's invented a machine that sends a person's essence into the past. The person doesn't leave the present. She – it's always a woman – remains seated in the professor's office while he observes her activities in the past on a computer screen. No, the woman doesn't need to wear a bikini to travel into the past, but bikinis make a sexy woman like Jenna Presley look even sexier.

A side effect of the time travel is that the woman feels horny and has sex with the first man or woman she meets in the past. That might not seem logical, but what do you expect from a Medina film?

Here's an updated summary of the Retromedia films so far, with the Blu-ray releases marked.

The Medina Collection

1. (BR) Thirteen Erotic Ghosts (2002)
2. (BR) Bikini Airways (2003)
3. (BR) Haunting Desires (2003)
4. Curse of the Erotic Tiki (2003)
5. Bikini Carwash Academy (2004)
6. Erotic Dreams of Jeannie (2004)
7. Teenage Cavegirl (2004)
8. The Good, the Bad and the Beautiful (2005)
9. Bikini Chain Gang (2005)
10. Ghost in a Teeny Bikini (2006)
11. Bikini Girls from the Lost Planet (2006)
12. (BR) Harlots of the Caribbean (2006)
13. Girl with the Sex-Ray Eyes (2006)
14. (BR) Bewitched Housewives (2006)
15. The Girl from BIKINI (2006)
16. (BR) Super Ninja Doll (2007)
17. (BR) Tarzeena (2007)
18. Voodoo Dollz (2008)
19. Bikini Royale (2008)
20. (BR) Bikini Frankenstein (2009)
21. (BR) Twilight Vamps (2009)
22. Bikini Royale 2 (2009)
23. (BR) Bikini Jones and the Temple of Eros (2009)
24. (BR) Housewives from Another World (2010)
25. Lady Chatterley's Ghost (2010)
26. (BR) Bikini Time Machine (2010)
27. (BR) Sexual Witchcraft (2010)
28. Bikini Warriors (2010)
29. The Teenie Weenie Bikini Squad (2011)
30. Dirty Blondes from Beyond (2012)
31. Busty Housewives of Beverly Hills (2012)
32. (BR) Baby Dolls Behind Bars (2012)

The McKendrick Collection

1. Strippers from another world (2013)
2. Big Bust Theory (2013)
3. Intergalactic Swingers (2013)
4. (BR) All Babe Network (2013)
5. Great Bikini Bowling Bash (2014)
6. Stacked Racks from Mars (2014)
7. Atomic Hotel Erotica (2014)
8. Lolita from Interstellar Space (2014)
9. Sexy Warriors (2014)
10. Bikini Avengers (2015)
11. (BR) College Coeds vs Zombie Housewives (2015)
12. Lust in Space (2015)
13. Erotic Vampires of Beverly Hills (2015)
14. (BR) Invisible Centerfolds (2015)
15. (BR) Cinderella's Hot Night (2017)
16. (BR) Sleeping Beauties (2017)

The Apocrypha

1. (BR) Bad Girls Behind Bars (2016)
2. Vixens From Venus (2016)
3. Cyborg Hookers (2016)
4. Cosmic Calendar Girls (2016)
5. Escape From Pleasure Planet (2016)
6. (BR) Paranormal Sexperiments (2016)

The Medina Collection consists of films directed by Fred Olen Ray using the pseudonym Juan Medina. The McKendrick Collection consists of films directed by Dean McKendrick. The Apocrypha consists of films directed for Retromedia by other directors.

Notes:

(1) "Bikini Carwash Academy" (Medina 5) was re-released with a different opening credits sequence, listing the director as Sherman Scott.

(2) "Tomb of the Werewolf" (not listed above) was directed by Fred Olen Ray using his own name, but it's in the Medina style. It has almost the same cast as "Haunting Desires".

(3) Dean McKendrick made seven erotic thrillers for Retromedia, not listed above.

(4) Apocrypha? If you have a better name for these films, let me know.

That's 21 out of 54 films released on Blu-ray so far. Let's hope the others will follow soon.