Showing posts with label Jake Gyllenhaal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jake Gyllenhaal. Show all posts

Monday, 20 April 2026

Ambulance (4 Stars)


Michael Bay's "Ambulance" is a loud, breathless exercise in controlled chaos that succeeds on its own terms. It takes a simple premise, a desperate bank robbery gone wrong, and stretches it into a near two-hour chase sequence that rarely lets up.

The standout feature is, unsurprisingly, the driving. The film's lengthy car chases are relentless, jittery and often astonishingly staged, with Bay turning Los Angeles highways into a shifting maze of ambulances, police cruisers and military response units. The camera rarely sits still; drones, dash cams and sweeping aerial shots create a constant sense of motion that borders on overwhelming but feels deliberately so.

Plot and character work are minimal, which is fine here. "Ambulance" is less interested in motivation than momentum, with Jake Gyllenhaal and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II driving much of the tension through escalating panic and strained brotherhood dynamics. It's scrappy rather than deep, but that suits the film's stripped-back survival structure.

It won’t convert anyone who finds Michael Bay's style exhausting, but for viewers willing to go along with the noise and velocity, it delivers exactly what it promises: an extended, high-octane chase film that barely pauses to breathe.

Success Rate:  - 0.7

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Saturday, 26 October 2024

Prince of Persia (3 Stars)


This is one of Gemma Arterton's American films that she made early in her career. She's now said that she'll never make films in America again, after feeling ashamed of the quality of "Hansel and Gretel Witchhunters". She felt it was a poor film, even though it was successful at the box office. I shan't argue with her, even though I disagree with her decision. She's more interested in producing artistic films than in making a lot of money. I respect her for that.

Interestingly enough, I recently received a comment from an anonymous reader telling me I should watch more good films. He gave me a few examples of directors I should watch, while telling me to stay away from Adam Sandler and Marvel movies. I totally disagreed with what he wrote and the way he wrote it. I'll watch any film in any genre, whether it's a Hollywood blockbuster or an obscure independent film, as long as I enjoy it.

There's a certain snobbishness among film fans who claim to know which films are better than others. Maybe they're people who've been to film schools, or maybe they're just people who read certain highbrow magazines. The wisest words I've heard on the subject are from the German director/producer Wolf C. Hartwig. Whether or not you like his films, you have to agree that he knew what he was talking about. He claimed that the measure of a good film is that it's a film people want to see. Not everyone, of course. There are different tastes. But if a film makes money, it's a good film. In an interview he singled out Rainer Werner Fassbinder, who was also named by the anonymous reader in his comment. To paraphrase his words, Wolf C. Hartwig said that people say Fassbinder made good films, but nobody wanted to watch them, which makes them bad films.

I've watched a lot of Fassbinder's films. I was in the middle of working my way through two box sets when I started writing my blog in 2010. You can find reviews of the last few films I watched. I bought the (relatively expensive) box sets because people had told me his films were good. I watched them with an open mind, and I didn't like them. I'll never watch them again.

Don't let anyone tell you you shouldn't watch a film because it's bad. Watch it for yourself. Make up your own mind. If a lot of people like the film, you can say it's a good film. If you like a film that few others like, you might have to grudgingly accept that it's not such a good film, but if you personally like it, don't let everyone else put you off. If you're a Fassbinder fan, go ahead and enjoy his films, but don't try to tell people the films are good.

Success Rate:  + 0.2

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Tuesday, 5 March 2024

Donnie Darko (5 Stars)


Incredible! I've been given another chance to see "Donnie Darko" in the cinema. That's the way it ought to be seen. It was shown today as part of the "Best of Cinema" series. It really is one of the best films ever made. German cinemas are cultivated and show the very best. I was also impressed that the cinema was almost full. There were only a few empty seats in the front row.


Here's a question for my readers. When Donnie, Gretchen and Frank are sitting in the cinema, what film are they watching? Don't google it, that's cheating. If you don't know the answer, watch the film again.

Success Rate:  - 0.3

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Wednesday, 21 June 2023

Source Code (4 Stars)



I own this film on disc, and I've been telling myself that I need to rewatch it for a long time, but I didn't realise until today just how long it's been. Twelve years! Time flies.

Someone has detonated a bomb on a train, killing over 400 people. Another attack is expected, so a government agency sends the army pilot Colter Stevens into the mind of one of the victims to relive the last eight minutes of his life. He has to use this time to find out who planted the bomb. If he fails, he has to repeat the eight minutes, over and over again.

"Source Code" is a well-crafted science fiction film, but you have to suspend belief. Despite the explanations given that it's all based on quantum physics, the bottom line is that the film doesn't make sense. "Groundhog Day" is more successful by not being explained. As soon as scientific explanations are offered, it should make sense, but it doesn't. Sometimes I over-analyse films.

Success Rate:  + 2.6

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Sunday, 18 December 2022

Strange World (3 Stars)


This is an animated film made by Walt Disney Studios. While the rest of the world was watching the final of the World Cup, I was sitting in the cinema with my grandson Oliver. I've been told that while I was in England he went to see two films with his grandmother, "Puss In Boots: The Last Wish" and "Der Räuber Hotzenplotz". He told me with great amusement that she fell asleep during "Puss in Boots", so he had to wake her.

When we left Oliver told me that he'd enjoyed the film, but I have to ask myself whether he really understood what was happening. "Strange World" has an age certificate of 6, which is Oliver's age. As far as the violence goes, it's suitable for children of that age, but I had to ask myself whether he was old enough to understand what was happening. I would have said that the film is more on the intellectual level of a nine-year-old. I think Oliver just enjoyed the bright pictures and the chaotic fight sequences, but I chose not to question him any further. Back at home his mother asked him what the film was about, and he hardly said anything.

So what's it about?

The film takes place in Avalonia, a small country separated from the world. An adventurer called Jaeger Clade has made it his life's goal to find out what's on the other side of the mountains that surround Avalonia. He starts an expedition which includes his 15-year-old son Searcher.

On the journey they find an unusual plant that gives off energy. Searcher says that it's an important discovery, and they should take it back to examine it. Jaeger says it's irrelevant, and they should continue with the expedition. The other members of the expedition agree with Searcher and turn back. Jaeger carries on by himself.

Back in Avalonia, the plant, which they call Pando, is found to be an inexhaustible energy source. It creates great prosperity and technological advances. Searcher becomes a farmer, harvesting Pando. But what about his father Jaeger? He doesn't come back, so he's presumed dead. Searcher marries and has a son, Ethan.

25 years later Searcher is told that the Pando plants outside of Avalonia, on the inner sides of the mountains, are beginning to die, the victims of an unknown disease. If the disease spreads into Avalonia, society will be destroyed. Ethan leaves on an expedition to find the cause for the disease. On the way they find Jaeger, now 60 years old, still trying to cross the mountains. Ethan has a flying ship, powered by Pando, so Jaeger persuades him to pool their resources.

Apart from the mission itself, it's a family drama. Jaeger is disappointed with his son, because Searcher's become a farmer instead of an adventurer. Searcher is disappointed with his son, because Ethan thinks farming is boring and wants to become an adventurer like his grandfather. Ironically, Jaeger and Searcher have become the same while considering themselves different.

Did Oliver understand all that? I don't know. What I do know is that he was fascinated by all the brightly coloured flying monsters.

I can only give the film an average rating. I like the story, as described above, but the action is too chaotic. I disliked the very part of the film that Oliver liked the most.

Friday, 9 September 2022

Spider-Man: No Way Home (5 Stars)


Today I watched the "More Fun Stuff" version of the film in the cinema. That's a silly name. Couldn't they just have called it the Extended Version? That would have been more dignified.

I'll refrain from writing about the film itself, even though I didn't say much about it in my past reviews. I'll just comment on the More Fun Stuff changes. The added scenes, a total of 13 minutes, are almost entirely at the beginning of the film, apart from a new after-credits scene. In my opinion, the new scenes don't improve the film at all. They're mostly interviews which just slow the film down. I'm not saying the scenes are bad, I'm just saying that it doesn't matter whether they're in the film or not. If there's a More Fun Stuff Blu-ray release, I'll only buy it if it's very cheap.

The original theatrical version had an after-credits scene that was effectively a trailer for "Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness". The More Fun Stuff version has an after-credits scene with Betty Brant praising her fellow students on being accepted into college. It's a cute scene, but totally unnecessary.

Here are a few sketches used in the final credits. They're simple but beautiful. I wish I were a gifted artist. Or even an average artist. I can't draw at all. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'm a zero.





Success Rate:  + 8.4

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Sunday, 31 July 2022

Spider-Man: No Way Home (5 Stars)


This is the 27th film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU). If you think that I must be smart to remember something like that, you're over-estimating me. I have a list of the films in a spreadsheet which I keep open while writing about MCU films. I also have little green stickers on the spines of my MCU Blu-ray discs, so I know what order they should be on my bookshelf.

Logically, "No Way Home" (I'll abbreviate the title) continues from the 26 previous MCU films, but it's unique in that it incorporates elements from non-MCU films. The film is all about the multiverse, so it re-introduces characters from previous versions of Spider-Man. In particular, we see the previous actors who played Spider-Man reprising their roles.


Three Spider-Men! Or should I say three Spider-Mans? What's the rule for the plural of proper names? Someone who's as fanatical about the English language as me ought to know the answer to that question. Please don't ask me when we meet in person, because I'd be sure to turn bright red.


Welcome back, Spider-Man #1, played by Tobey Maguire from 2002 to 2007. He's aged in the last 15 years. Haven't we all? I wish they'd used makeup to make him look younger.


Welcome back, Spider-Man #2, played by Andrew Garfield from 2012 to 2014. His career was cut short when "Amazing Spider-Man 3" was cancelled. I was never happy that Peter Parker's father was made an important character, but I wish the third part of the trilogy had been made to tie up the loose ends. The final scene of "Amazing Spider-Man 2" introduced the Rhino, possibly as a member of the Sinister Six, but the next film was never made.

Accompanying the Spider-Mans into the Marvel Cinematic Universe are Doctor Octopus, Green Goblin, Sandman, Electro and the Lizard. Strangely, the wrong version of Venom was drawn into the MCU. Eddie Brock from Earth-TRN688 arrived, not Eddie Brock from Earth-96283. I assume this was a blunder, because there's no logical reason for it.

The story is continued in the 28th MCU film, "Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness", which I plan to watch later this week. The two films couldn't be more different. "No Way Home" is a serious film, whereas "Multiverse of Madness" is spoilt by too much humour. Still, I'm biased in favour of Sam Raimi, so I'll make an effort to enjoy "Multiverse of Madness" when I watch it again.


Happy Hogan uses a CPAP machine to get eight hours of undisturbed sleep.


This is Zendaya's third film as Peter Parker's girlfriend MJ. She looks more attractive in each film. Remind me to publish a photo gallery showing her development from film to film.


Tasty! I'd visit her café for a donut every day.


Peter Parker doesn't have a sweet tooth. He just orders a cup of coffee.


One question is left unanswered, in this film at least: are there just three Spider-Mans or many many more? Maybe there are many versions of Mike Hood aka Dancer in the multiverse. Some of them probably write better blogs than me. I should meet them to get a few pointers. Or maybe I'm a singularity who only exists in one universe. Until then, don't forget:

I am Dancer.

Success Rate:  + 7.5

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Monday, 28 March 2022

Ambulance (4 Stars)


Michael Bay isn't a popular director. He's a director that "serious" film fans love to hate. When I try to talk about him with my friends there's an awkward silence. There are many arguments against his films, and the main one is his preference of action and spectacle over story and characters. That would normally be enough to turn me off, but I say that it's all about what a director intends to do and whether he succeeds with his intentions. I connect Michael Bay's name with car chases and explosions.

That's what I went to the cinema to see today: car chases and explosions. It was a poor attendance. EM 1 in Stuttgart is a medium sized cinema, with 220 seats, but there were only three people in the room. I spoke to one of the others before he sat down, and he was apologetic, as if ashamed to be there: "I don't normally like Michael Bay, but there are no other films I want to see today". I didn't get a chance to speak to him afterwards, so I'm curious whether the film won him over.

The film's background is that a notorious armed robber in Los Angeles has two sons, Danny and Will. Danny is his own son, Will is adopted. Together they embark on a life of crime. Then Will has regrets. He joins the army and fights in Afghanistan. When he comes home he has trouble finding a job. His wife needs an operation that will cost her $230,000. His father is dead, so he goes to his brother to ask for a loan. Danny is rich, having inherited his father's business, but he says he doesn't have the cash readily available. He offers Will something better. Danny is planning a bank robbery and expecting to get $32 million. He promises Will half the money.

Danny didn't expect trouble, but the police had been given a tip off. There's a big shoot out. Will and Danny hijack an ambulance in which a paramedic wants to take an injured policeman to hospital. The police pursue and try to stop the ambulance, but they won't shoot at it because they don't want their colleague in the ambulance to die.

There's an exciting 65-minute car chase, with the ambulance being pursued by police cars and helicopters. That's something you only get in a Michael Bay film. It can be seen from two sides. On the outside, it's a typical high speed car chase, but inside the ambulance there's tense, claustrophobic drama. Danny and Will have to deal with the young paramedic, Cam, whose biggest priority is saving the policeman's life.

I went to the cinema today to see action, and that's what I got. The character development wasn't as bad as I expected. It was done on the go, not at the beginning. When the film began the characters were strangers, but after the first hour I felt I knew them. The film was satisfying to me, and I think the people in the 217 empty seats missed out.

Sunday, 2 January 2022

Spider-Man: No Way Home (5 Stars)


I finally got a chance to see the new Spider-Man film today. It's been sold out for the last two weeks, unlike "The Matrix Resurrections", which hasn't been so popular with cinema audiences.

I don't want to give away too much for a new film, so I'll restrict myself to what we see in the trailer. At the end of "Spider-Man: Far From Home" it was announced to the world that Peter Parker was Spider-Man. This has disrupted his life, so he visits Doctor Strange and asks him to cast a spell to make everyone forget who he is. The spell tampers with the multiverse, so we see various enemies from other versions of Spider-Man appear to challenge him.

To get technical: this film, along with the whole of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU), takes place in a universe called Earth-199999.

Sam Raimi's Spider-Man films take place in Earth-96283.

The Amazing Spider-Man films take place in Earth-120703.

Don't blame me! I didn't invent these numbers!

On a less technical level, after the merging and alliances of various film studios, there was a push to reconcile the different versions of Spider-Man with one another. This idea scared me. It's a recipe for disaster. I was pleasantly surprised that the film turned out so well. It's chaotic. Anyone who walks in who hasn't watched dozens of Marvel films over the last 18 years won't have any idea what's going on. Nevertheless, "No Way Home" accurately captures the style and atmosphere of Marvel comics. The plot gets ridiculous as it progresses – no spoilers! – but it fits the story.

Maybe just one spoiler: Wong is now the Sorcerer Supreme? That's just silly!

Sunday, 14 November 2021

Donnie Darko (5 Stars)


As my regular readers know, I don't consider my blog to be primarily a film review site. It's a film diary. The difference is important. I write about every film I watch, without exception, in the order I watch them. I also write about a film every time I watch it. Today is the eighth time I've watched "Donnie Darko" since I started my blog, so I can't think of anything to write that I haven't written already.

So this post won't get many hits. Tough luck. There are plenty of other posts that are popular with my readers. Check out my popular post list on the right of the screen, if you're reading this on a PC. Unfortunately, you won't see it if you're reading on a phone. According to my blog statistics (which only I can see) 44% of my readers use a Macintosh, 36% of my readers use Windows and 2% of my readers use Linux, so it's only a small percentage of my readers who use a phone.

Success Rate:  - 0.3

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Tuesday, 21 September 2021

Donnie Darko (5 Stars)


For me this was a dream come true: the chance to see "Donnie Darko" in the cinema. I missed it when it was the cinema 20 years ago. At the time I lived next to a large cinema on the edge of Birmingham. I walked past the cinema every day on the way to the bus stop. I even remember seeing the poster for "Donnie Darko" hanging outside. The blue shading made it look like a horror film, so I wasn't interested. In 2001 there was already Internet, but it wasn't as prolific then as it is today. What I mean is, it wasn't as easy to find summaries of new films as it is today. So I missed it.

I forgot all about it until three years later. I was chatting about films in an IRC chat room. One of the girls said, "Donnie Darko is the best film ever made". Another girl replied, "Yes, it is". That made me jump in my chair. Two people told me a film was the best film they'd ever seen, and it was a film I'd never seen. I couldn't let that rest. When we stopped chatting I ordered the film online before going to bed. That was 16th April 2004. (Amazon keeps perfect record of my orders). It arrived a few days later, and the rest is history. It immediately became one of my favourite films. In my recent top 100 film list I put it in second place. 

I always regretted never having seen the film on the big screen. Now I finally had a chance. There was a special screening today to celebrate the 20th anniversary of its release. It was shown in connection with a strange short film called "Nimic" starring Matt Dillon. I've never been a fan of short films. Either too little happens or too little is explained. In this case it was the latter.

The theatre was almost full, apart from the empty seats necessary for the Coronavirus social distancing. Before the film began, the host asked how many of us had already seen the film in the cinema. Very few hands went up. Evidently, the film was never shown in German cinemas, apart from film festivals. In 2001 "Donnie Darko" was shown at the Fantasy Film Festival in Stuttgart. Then the host asked how many had never seen "Donnie Darko" before. About a third of the audience put their hands up. That amazed me. I thought that almost everyone would be a fan of the film. However, I envy the first-timers. "Donnie Darko" is a film that deserves to be seen on the big screen. I tried to forget the film and enjoy it as one of them. The film is overwhelming. So much happens, and the intensity steadily increases as the film progresses. When the song "Mad World" began in the final scene, I had tears in my eyes.

"Donnie Darko" isn't an easy film to understand. It's a film that needs to be watched several times. If it's too complicated for you, watch the Director's Cut, in which there are additional scenes that explain things. Then go back and watch the theatrical version again, because it's better. Take my word for it.

Now I want to see the film in the cinema again. Maybe the 25th anniversary, if I live that long. I'll probably watch it on disc again in the next few weeks.

Success Rate:  - 0.3

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Sunday, 12 September 2021

Donnie Darko (5 Stars)



"I hope that when the world comes to an end I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to".

Donnie Darko is a mentally disturbed teenager who lives in the sleepy little town of Middlesex, Virginia. He frequently sleepwalks and wakes up on the golf course or on the side of the road. On 2nd October 1988 a giant rabbit called Frank tells him to wake up and leave the house. While he's away an aircraft engine falls on his house, directly onto his room. Frank warns Donnie that the world will end in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes and 12 seconds.

Thankful that Frank has saved his life, he proceeds to do whatever Frank tells him to do. He smashes the water pipes and floods his school. He burns down the house of a local motivational speaker.

Donnie considers himself a superhero. He also believes he's doing God's will, although the God he believes in isn't necessarily the Christian God. He's willing to sacrifice himself to save the world.


When he's in the cinema watching "Evil Dead" with his girlfriend Gretchen, only he can see Frank. Is Donnie insane? Donnie doubts his own sanity, but if he doesn't try to save the world, who else will?

The film's plot is mind-bending. It has to be watched several times to be understood. Three years after the theatrical release, a Director's Cut was made with scenes inserted that make the film easier to understand. That's the version I watched today. It's good, but I prefer the theatrical release, which I'll be able to watch in the cinema a week from now.

Success Rate:  - 0.3

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Thursday, 30 January 2020

Spider-Man: Far From Home (5 Stars)


The first 23 films of the Marvel Cinematic Universe are referred to collectively as the Infinity Saga. The six infinity stones are shown repeatedly in the films, though their significance isn't always clear to the uninitiated. What I mean to say is, those who have read the comics written by Steve Englehart and Jim Starlin in the late 1980's and early 1990's know what the stones are supposed to be, but then they have to work out if they're something different in the films. Those who haven't read the comics can only scratch their heads in confusion.

We see the first stone, the Space Stone, in "Captain America" (the fifth MCU film). Starting in "The Avengers" (the sixth film) we see Thanos beginning to gather the stones to give himself great power. In the comics the united power of the stones makes him a God, but in the films they merely combine to become a super-weapon. He succeeds in gathering all the stones and using his weapon in "Infinity War" (the 19th film). The Avengers use the weapon against him in "Avengers Endgame" (the 22nd film).

Now we have "Spider-Man Far From Home" as a sort of epilogue. Thanos is dead and the stones have been scattered throughout the universe. Now we see the aftermath of the "Blip", as people have come to call it.

50% of the Earth's population disappeared, probably in 2018. The exact year of the disappearance is unclear, but what we know is that five years later, probably 2023, they returned without having aged. This causes more confusion in school than anywhere else. Children who were the same age are now five years older than one another. Peter Parker, aka Spider-Man, is one of those affected. It's 21 years since he was born, but he's still 16. This leads to ethical problems. Is he allowed to drink alcohol or isn't he?


Fortunately for Peter, the girl he loves also blipped, so she's still the same age as him. In the film (and in school) she's only referred to as MJ. That was the nickname of Peter's girlfriend and future wife in the comics, Mary Jane Watson. The film's producers have stated that in the MCU Spider-Man films MJ's nickname stands for Michelle Jones, but until that's verified in the films themselves I choose not to believe it.


MJ is cute, in a girl-next-door-ish sort of way.


The actress Zendaya Coleman was actually 22 when the film was made, but she looks like a 16-year-old in the film.


Tom Holland, who plays Peter Parker, is also 22. Let's hope they keep their young looks so they can make another few films together.


The super-villain in this film is Mysterio. He was one of Spider-Man's oldest and most deadly enemies. Incidentally, Sam Raimi wanted to cast Bruce Campbell as Mysterio if he'd been allowed to direct "Spider-Man 4".


He looks remarkably similar to the way Steve Ditko drew him in the comics. That's not something we can take for granted. The Marvel films get almost every costume wrong.

This is a better film than "Spider-Man Homecoming", though not up to the level of the Sam Raimi Spider-Man films. Where will the Spider-Man franchise go from here? We need continuity. We don't want a reboot and yet another Spider-Man any time in the next few years.

Success Rate:  + 5.1

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Monday, 30 September 2019

Okja (4 Stars)


"Never mistranslate. Translations are sacred".

This is a South Korean film, with some of the dialogue in English. It's distributed exclusively by Netflix, so if you weren't lucky enough to see it on the big screen during its original release, it's too late now. Some Netflix films are released on Blu-ray, but not "Okja".

The Mirando corporation has created genetically modified giant pigs in order to solve world hunger and make a profit. They know that the public is opposed to genetically modified food, so they claim that the pigs are offsprings of a rare type of pig found in the wild. To win popularity for their pigs a lengthy promotional campaign is staged. 26 piglets are sent to farmers around the world, and after 10 years the most beautiful pigs will be selected for breeding.

The film is centred around Okja, a female pig raised by an old farmer in the mountains of Korea. He doesn't have to do much, because the pig has been adopted by his granddaughter Mija. For her Okja is more than a farmyard animal, she's a pet, even a friend.

After 10 years Okja is collected to be taken back to America. This is devastating for Mija. She attempts to prevent this happening, and she has unexpected allies. The Animal Liberation Front (ALF) attacks the transport convoy and attempts to steal Okja.


A lot of people don't like CGI in films, but this is an example of CGI making the film what it is. The giant pig has been perfectly crafted by the film's special effects engineers, and it looks so sweet and lovable. Okja is the real star of the film, and Okja's co-star is Ahn Seo-hyun, who was 13 when the film was made. The big names in the film, Jake Gyllenhaal, Tilda Swinton and Paul Dano, only appear in minor roles.

It's worth pointing out that Jake Gyllenhaal plays a very untypical role for him, as the obnoxious television host Dr. Johnny Wilcox. We can't help but hate him whenever he appears on the screen.

Success Rate:  - 23.8

Sunday, 28 July 2019

Spider-Man: Far From Home (5 Stars)


Today I went to see "Spider-Man: Far From Home" in the cinema for the second time. The first time was in 2D, which I prefer. Today was in 3D. The best thing I can say about the 3D experience is that it wasn't intrusive. With the exception of the on-screen texts that announced the arrival in new cities, it didn't even look like 3D.

The only way I can enjoy the new Spider-Man films is my shutting my eyes and forgetting the original comics. After the tragic miscasting of Andrew Garfield, an attempt has been made to find an actor who looks and talks like the nerdy 1960's teenager that I loved when I was growing up. Tom Holland is a good choice. I've heard people summing it up, "Tobey Maguire was a good Peter Parker, Andrew Garfield was a good Spider-Man, Tom Holland is good at both". I agree. Arguably, Tobey Maguire was the best Peter Parker of all in his first film, but he slacked off in the other two films, for the simple fact that he was too old. Even though Spider-Man went through different life phases as he grew up, from a college student to a married man, he's best known as the young teenager from the early comics written by Stan Lee. His age was never explicitly stated, but he seemed to be 14 or 15. In "Far From Home" Peter Parker says that he's 16. That's close enough. Tom Holland was 22 when he made the film, but he looked like a teenager, and I hope he'll stay young long enough to make a few more films.

Immense effort must have been made into casting Peter Parker, but the supporting cast has been picked so badly that it can't possibly be a mistake. Nobody can make that many mistakes, it must be deliberate. Stan Lee's comics featured an all-white school in Forest Hills, New York. The new films force ethnic diversity down our throats. While it's true that Forest Hills isn't 100% white, as suggested by the comics, it only has a 3% black population, compared to 24% in New York City overall.


However, the biggest shock in the casting isn't about ethnicity, it's about MJ's hair colour. The studio has stated that MJ in the new films isn't supposed to be the same person as Mary Jane Watson in Sam Raimi's films, but in both films "MJ" is Peter Parker's love interest. In the comics she was famous for her red hair, a dark crimson colour that didn't look genuine. Kirsten Dunst was a more natural strawberry blonde, but she was still recognisable as the comic book character.


It's not just about the hair colour, it's about the attitude. Mary Jane was an out-and-out extrovert. She knew that men were crazy about her looks, and she enjoyed it. Eventually we found out that she had a deeper side, but she kept it well hidden, only showing her air-headed all-day party self to the world. The new MJ has a tomboy appearance and a goth attitude, and she's awkward with boys. That's a completely different MJ.

And I shan't even start on Aunt May.....

Friday, 19 July 2019

Spider-Man: Far From Home (5 Stars)


I've finally got round to seeing "Spider-Man: Far From Home", the 23rd film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It's sad that it has to continue without Stan Lee. I was hoping that there might be a cameo that he filmed before his death, but none came. He's gone.

It's still too early for a full review, because I don't want to give away any spoilers. I'll just make a few points for now.

Mysterio says to Spider-Man that he's come from Earth-833, and Spider-Man's universe is called Earth-616. This is definitely a mistake, but whose mistake is it? Did the script-writer make a mistake, or did he deliberately put false words into Mysterio's mouth? Everyone knows that the Marvel Cinematic Universe takes place in Earth-199999, not Earth-616. Apart from that, where did Mysterio get the number from? Did he read it in a comic?

The girl in Peter Parker's class, MJ, confuses me. She's not Mary Jane Watson, but she's still Peter Parker's love interest. Curious.


It's good to see a romance finally developing between Ned Leeds and Betty Brant. After all, they got married in Amazing Spider-Man #156 (May 1976). This assumes that they're even meant to be the same characters. In the film they've swapped hair colours, they're younger, and Ned's even a different race.


You see what I mean? I've never understood why screenwriters need to change so much of what was written into comic book canon by Stan Lee. Oh yeah, it's a different universe, so they can write whatever they want? That's a lame excuse.

I'm so happy that J. K. Simmons has returned to play J. Jonah Jameson, the chief editor of the Daily Bugle. He last played the role in Sam Raimi's Spider-Man films from 2002 to 2007, which supposedly took place in Earth-96283. Nobody else could possibly play the role.

I was surprised to see that most of the cinema audience stood up and left after the mid-credits scene. Usually German audiences are better educated and know they should wait for a post-credits scene. In this case it was an important scene which will have repercussions for the future films.

Happy Hogan is dating Aunt May? I'm sure every comic book fan has a sick feeling in his stomach.

Overall the film has a more juvenile atmosphere. It seems to be written for teenagers, which couldn't be said of the previous Spider-Man films, even "Homecoming". That's not necessarily a criticism. It's a good film. I can't wait to see where the MCU will go next.