The Avengers 5.01 - The Fear Merchants

Last year I watched the fourth season of the Avengers. I didn't write complete reviews. I divided the season into three parts and wrote my general thoughts. A year later, I feel braver. I feel more able to write complete reviews of each episode after gaining experience with "Smallville" and "Masha and the Bear". Whether I'll have time to write reviews is a different matter. I'm already falling behind with things that I want to write.

Each episode in the fifth season begins with this screen, announcing that the Avengers is in colour. This was relevant, because the first four seasons of the Avengers were all made in black and white. As far as I know, this screen was only added to the American television broadcasts. This season was broadcast from 14th January to 18th November 1967, but colour television wasn't available in the UK until 15th November 1969. (Apart from some experimental broadcasts, mostly on BBC2). It's a shame that the text on the screen was written by someone who didn't know how to spell "colour".

Everyone already knew that Diana Rigg was a beautiful actress, but she looked stunning in colour. Only the Americans profited from this. I watched the episodes every week in black and white, and my parents didn't buy a colour television until 1980. The prices of colour televisions were prohibitive at the time. The first time I saw the Avengers in colour was in 2003 when I bought the series on DVD. The Avengers series was one of the main reasons that I invested in my first DVD player. But I don't watch the DVDs any more. In 2015 the series was rereleased on Blu-ray, and it looks better than ever.

The episodes were included on the DVDs in their broadcast order, but on the Blu-rays in their production order. It doesn't make much of a difference, because the episodes were all standalone stories that can be watched in any order. I'll review the episodes in their production order.

Sadly, the first episode is one of the weakest episodes in the season. It has a premise that doesn't stand up. It's called "The Fear Merchants", because it's about a company which sells fear to its customers. Does that sound strange to you? It's easy to explain, but difficult to believe.

The company is called Business Efficiency Bureau. They promise customers that they'll make them successful by eliminating the competition. For instance, Jeremy Raven is the owner of a ceramics company. It's the largest ceramics company in Britain, but there are seven competing companies, individually smaller than his, but in total holding more than 50% of the market share. He proposes mergers, with himself as the head of the new companies, but they all turn him down. He turns to the Business Efficiency Bureau for help. Their fee is 50% of the increase  in profits.

The BEB sends a market research questionnaire to the owner of each of the seven competitors. Based on the results, a psychiatrist calculates what the person's greatest fear is. For instance, a businessman who suffers from agoraphobia is drugged and then carried to Wembley Stadium, where he wakes up the next day. The shock drives him mad. Another man is scared of spiders, and the appearance of a giant spider in his room gives him a mental breakdown.

The problems are manifold. What if a company chief refuses to answer the questionnaire? Is it certain that he's also afraid of something? If he is, what are the chances that he's so terrified of <fill-in-the-blank> that being exposed to it will drive him mad?

The head of the BEB is Pemberton, played by the veteran actor Patrick Cargill. He was best known for playing comedy roles, but in this episode he has the air of a Bond villain.

Every Bond villain needs a muscle-bound henchman at his side. That's Gilbert.

The brilliant but evil psychiatrist is Dr. Voss. Oh wait! I've just decided that she's my biggest fear. If I woke up in the morning and found her lying naked in bed with me I'd scream at the top of my voice.

What was Jeremy Raven thinking? If I walked into a business meeting and were confronted by characters like this, I'd turn and leave immediately.

Pemberton and his cronies are no match for John Steed and Emma Peel. All it takes is for Steed to swing his umbrella at them and Emma to aim a few karate chops.

Here's a gratuitous rear view of Emma Peel and John Steed.

I hope you enjoy it. There are also naked feet in the episode, but I'll save treats like that for a future review.

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Last Night in Soho (5 Stars)

This is a supernatural horror film directed by Edgar Wright. It's different to any of his previous films. In particular, there's no humour, which I've always considered to be his trademark.

Eloise Turner, nicknamed Ellie, lives in Redruth, Cornwall. Yes, the town really does exist, although it's so obscure that I had to check Google Maps to verify its existence. She dreams of becoming a fashion designer, so she goes to London to study fashion. She's fascinated by the 1960's, the music and the fashion. She also has a gift, if it can be called that. She sees visions of her mother, who died when she was seven. Most people would accuse Ellie of being mad, but her grandmother believes her.

At college Ellie is immediately an outsider. Her fellow students are all modern girls, so Ellie's interest in the 1960's makes her seem antiquated. After a few days sharing a room in the students hall of residence she moves out to live by herself in a bedsit.

Her new accommodation has a history of violence, which Ellie's psychic gift picks up, whether she wants it or not. When she's asleep she sees herself as Sandy, a glamorous aspiring singer in the 1960's who hopes to be the next Cilla Black. She enters the body of this singer and experiences her tragic life as she's forced into prostitution to make money. What starts as dreams turns into waking visions that she can't turn off, although she's no longer in the woman's body in these visions. It comes to a climax when Ellie witnesses Sandy being murdered.

Ellie reports the murder to the police, which isn't a good idea. "I'd like to report a murder that took place in my room 50 years ago. I saw it in a vision". The police don't help, but Ellie doesn't give up. She searches newspaper archives for articles about dead bodies or missing people 50 years ago. But the visions are continuing, intruding into her life more and more.

Thomasin McKenzie as Ellie.

Anya Taylor-Joy as Sandy.

They're two beautiful young women from two different worlds whose lives are intertwined.

The film starts slowly as the mystery unravels, and it becomes terrifying as the visions intensify and Ellie can't escape. It's an excellent horror film, and I hope that Edgar Wright will make more films like this.

Success Rate:  - 1.9

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TV Series: The Avengers Season 4 Part 3

After finishing "Banshee" yesterday I've returned to "The Avengers", which I last watched in February. "The Avengers" is a series that can be easily interrupted, because the episodes are all standalone stories.

I have to offer a word of explanation for calling my reviews "Part 1", "Part 2", etc. "The Avengers" seasons aren't divided into parts. It's only my reviews that are divided. I hope that's cleared up the confusion.

"The Avengers" is one of my favourite series, especially the fourth season. I intended to name a top three of the season four episodes, but only two episodes stand out: "The House that Jack built" and "Death at Bargain Prices". I like all the other episodes equally.

Steed is a perfect gentleman. He maintains eye contact while talking with this busty blonde. It would have been too hard for me.

He even maintains eye contact when she jumps on his lap. Do you recognise the actress? It's Carol Cleveland, who's best known for appearing in "Monty Python's Flying Circus", the series and the films.

By the way, here's a question for pub quizzes: "What is Emma Peel's maiden name?" This newspaper clipping shown in "The House that Jack built" gives us the answer. Of course, if you're a serious Avengers fan you knew that already.

Here's another newspaper clipping. We're never told why Emma Knight left the company that she inherited from her father.

In my last Avengers review I included a lot of photos of Emma Peel's face. I don't apologise for it; Diana Rigg has an amazing face. Here's a character in the episode "What the Butler saw" whose office is practically a temple to Emma Peel. Look at the photos on his shelf.

Here's a closer look. But can you blame him?

I'd be happier with one large photo. Talk about obsession!

I'll leave you with my own personal photo gallery, screenshots taken from "The House that Jack built". The gun that she's carrying is so small that I thought it was a fake, but the ever reliable Internet Movie Firearms Database states that it's a Smith & Wesson 4th Model Revolver with a .32 calibre. I haven't been able to find a review of the gun, but I assume that it does its job.

It will probably be a few months before I start watching season five. I have other viewing plans. Be patient, I'll get to it eventually.

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On Her Majesty's Secret Service (5 Stars)

James Bond is back! The poster means that there's a new James Bond film after a two year gap. He was hardly missed. But he's also back in my blog. This is the sixth James Bond film, made in 1969. I reviewed the first film, "Dr. No", in 2017, and the following four films in 2020. It's time for me to continue watching the Classic James Bond films, where Classic has a capital C. The first 20 films are what I call the Classic James Bond films. "Casino Royale" (2006) was a reboot of the James Bond franchise, retelling the original stories. I shan't get into arguments about which films are better, the Classic films or the reboots. There are so many different factors to consider.

This is the first film made without Sean Connery. He said that "You only live twice" would be his last film. He didn't want to be typecast by playing Bond for the rest of his life. The Australian actor George Lazenby was picked, even though he'd previously only acted in commercials. He was offered a contract for seven films, but he turned it down for several reasons. He said that he thought the days of spy films were over. He's still alive today, so he must be kicking himself for making such a foolish statement. Apart from that, his fellow actors said that he had an arrogant attitude. He complained that the director told him what to do and how to do it. That's why they call it directing! He was in an envious position, being picked as the main actor for a top film in his first role. If he'd listened to advice and had done what he was told for the next seven Bond films, he'd be one of the world's top actors today. As it turned out, his following film roles became smaller and smaller. If it weren't for playing James Bond he'd be totally forgotten today.

After saying that, I have to admit that he's very good in the role. He's a remarkably good imitation of Sean Connery, even though he's slightly less rugged. He has the same suave, sophisticated charm when he sits in a casino. He delivers the infamous James Bond one-liners with the same casual look on his face as Sean Connery.

There's a hilarious moment in the scene before the opening credits, in which he makes an out-of-character statement. Bond rescues a women from drowning, and then she steals his car and drives away. He says that "This never happened to the other fellow", referring to Sean Connery. No girl ever resisted his charms, and he never suffered the shame of having his car stolen, even though he got it back a few minutes later.

Bond's main opponent, Ernst Stavro Blofeld, returns after being seen in the last film. In "You only live twice" he was played by Donald Pleasance, now he's played by Telly Savalas. This change of actors doesn't work well, in my opinion. They have a similar physical appearance, but their facial expressions and their mannerisms are totally different. Donald Pleasance's Blofeld had a manic, almost comical quality. Telly Savalas is deadly serious.

I don't mean this as a slight on the acting abilities of Telly Savalas. I'm sure he could have acted more like Donald Pleasance if he'd wanted to. It was a new director for this film, and he probably wanted to make Blofeld more sinister.

Most James Bond films have at least two Bond girls, the Good Bond Girl and the Bad Bond Girl. This film only has one. Diana Rigg plays the Countess Teresa de Vincenzo, who prefers to call herself Tracy. There's no Bad Bond Girl in the film, unless you include Ilse Steppat as Blofeld's assistant, Irma Bunt.

This should have been a recurring role, but she died of a heart attack shortly after making the film.

What a ferocious looking woman! She deserves to be called a Bond Girl, even if she doesn't succumb to Bond's charms.

And while we're talking about Bond's charms, Miss Moneypenny still can't resist him. Bond is bad to her. He flirts furiously with her, but he always breaks his promise of going on a date with her. She's not pretty enough for him.

This is a very sexist (mis)representation of women. Miss Moneypenny is the ugly woman in the office who's fallen for an attractive man who's out of her league. Bond has no hesitation sleeping with one woman after another, but he won't even take Miss Moneypenny out for dinner.

So that's his excuse? I feel like slapping him.

And yet sexism is an important feature of the James Bond films. There are calls for the films to be brought up to date, but if James Bond were no longer sexist he wouldn't be James Bond any more. We smile forgivingly when he uses women for his own pleasure. It's only fiction, isn't it? Bond is a perfect gentleman, outwardly, but it's all a ploy to get women into his bed. 

I have more respect for Blofeld. He's also attracted to Tracy, understandably, but instead of trying to seduce her he makes a serious offer of marriage.

As always, the film includes a spectacular car chase. It also has two chases on skis and one chase in bobsleighs. It's been more than 12 years since I last watched this film. I shouldn't wait so long before watching it again. But first let me work my way through the Classic James Bond films.

Success Rate:  + 9.7

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