A Royal Night Out (4½ Stars)

This is an absolutely delightful film that I have to keep returning to. It's about the Queen I've known and loved all my life, and her precocious little sister. The film is fictional, but wrapped in a series of true events. It's best enjoyed if you don't try to work out what's true and what isn't. Just accept the whole film as it is.

I wonder if one day there will be a film of King Charles' teenage antics. That would be amusing.

I've been having problems with the temperature the last few days, especially today. I don't understand it. Earlier today it was 28 degrees, which was too much for me. Anything over 25 makes me sweat. But now the temperature is only 18 degrees, and I'm still sweating. I need to go to bed with my fan turned up.

	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

A Royal Night Out (4½ Stars)

When an actor or actress dies, I watch one or more films in which he/she appears. Three days ago my beloved monarch Queen Elizabeth II died. She's not an actress, so I don't have any films in which she appears, but I do own one film about her: "A Royal Night Out". It's a film that treads a fine line. Any fictional film about the Queen could be insulting and irreverent, but "A Royal Night Out" has been filmed so carefully and respectfully that it avoids any pitfalls.

The film begins on VE Day, 8th May 1945, and continues into the morning of the following day. It was the day the War in Europe ended. It was a time of great rejoicing for all of Britain, but the film concentrates on the rejoicing in London. King George VI was due to hold a speech at midnight to be broadcast on the radio. His daughters Elizabeth (19) and Margaret (14) wanted to witness the celebrations from the other side of the palace walls. Margaret in particular wanted to visit nightclubs where she could enjoy the latest dances, especially the Lindy Hop. I wonder how she knew it in the days before television. Maybe newsreels were shown in the palace?

The girls are allowed to go to the Ritz, accompanied by army officers as their chaperones. Margaret doesn't like being controlled, so she slips away as soon as possible. Elizabeth is slightly more sensible, but she also leaves the Ritz to look for her sister. The soldiers guarding them are laughably incompetent. The streets of London are a confusing world to young Elizabeth, but she makes contact with an airman called Jack who guides her around.

The film shows Elizabeth's sorrow as not being able to lead a normal life. She's forced to carry out official duties, and unknown to her she'd have to carry out ever increasing duties for the next 77 years. The film shows a romance develop between Elizabeth and Jack, but she's wise enough to know that it could never be. At the end of the film they go different ways, never to see one another again.

The actress Sarah Gadon has been in several films that I've watched, but I've never noticed her. Maybe that's a good thing. A good actor shouldn't stand out, he should disappear into his role. Nevertheless, I'll watch out for her in future.

	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

A Royal Night Out (4½ Stars)

Today is VE Day. It's 75 years since the end of World War Two, as far as Europe was concerned. VE stands for Victory in Europe. The last enemy, Japan, didn't surrender until 2nd September 1945, but as far as Britain was concerned the war was already over. Nobody was dropping bombs on London any more.

The distinction between the two dates, 8th May 1945 and 2nd September 1945, is essential to the film. Airman Jack Hodges has flown more than 50 missions over Germany. He'd like to think the war is over, but for him it isn't. He's just received news that he'll be reassigned to Japan. He signed up to defend his country against Germany, but what does a faraway enemy like Japan mean to him? He just wants to go home to his mother.

One thing that strikes me about the film is the level of patriotism 75 years ago. People were British and proud to be British, and being British meant standing behind their King. The very few who refused to toast the King – and Jack was one of them – were beat up and thrown into the streets.

How did we lose that? When did we lose that? In 1977 there were street parties throughout the country to celebrate the 25-year anniversary of Queen Elizabeth. In 2002 the 50-year anniversary went by unnoticed apart from television broadcasts. I didn't see a single street party. People didn't care.

In 2012 it was slightly different, in Birmingham at least. The annual Gay Pride celebration fell on the same date as the Queen's 60-year anniversary, so the two celebrations were combined. The event's slogan was "Proud to be Gay, Proud to be British".

I was present at the Gay Pride Parade almost every year while I lived in Birmingham, but the 2012 celebrations were by far the most overwhelming. There was magic in the air, more than any of the years before or afterwards.

Being proud to be British means being proud to have a monarch. It's a contradiction to be anti-Royalist and pro-British. The monarchy, and for me that means the Queen, sums up everything about Britain. Maybe it's easy for me to say that today, because the Queen of England is such a noble, distinguished person. It's easy for me to shout "God Save The Queen". Will it be just as easy for me to shout "God Save The King" when her son or her grandson takes over? I don't know. If I live that long you can ask me. I expect I shall always respect the King, even if I have personal reservations about his character. I have no reservations at all about the Queen.

Today most of my friends are anti-Royalists. They complain about the wealth of the Royal Family in comparison to the poverty of the lower classes in England. They don't realise that the Queen isn't the richest person in Britain; she's not even in the top 50. If we really want to redistribute wealth, the Queen isn't the person to start with.

What do we need to win back support for the monarchy? Another war? That would be cynical. A prime minister who's so wretched that people beg for a king to save them? That's unlikely to happen. If a woman who's as wonderful as the Queen can't maintain the affection of her people, what chance do future monarchs have?

The subject matter of "A Royal Night Out" has been handled delicately. It could easily have turned into something tasteless. Sarah Gadon puts on a fine performance as the 19-year-old Princess Elizabeth. She's a young woman who shows immaturity due to having being locked away from the world all her life, but she has an air of dignity in the midst of the common people. All the wealth at her fingertips doesn't make her happy. She's a prisoner of her destiny. She has feelings for Jack Hodges, but she knows that their relationship can never be.

	Order from Amazon.com
	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

St. Trinian's 2: The Legend of Fritton's Gold (4 Stars)

"Girls are far more intelligent than boys".

That must be true. It's in the newspapers.

I had to get that out of the way before I start the review.

This is a sequel to "St. Trinian's", made two years earlier in 2007. Since the first film things have moved on. The new girl, Annabelle Fritton, has become the head girl. The previous head girl, Kelly Jones, has joined MI7, a British spy organisation so secret that not even MI6 knows it exists.

Unfortunately Kelly Jones only appears in a short portion of the film, when Annabelle asks for her help. That's a shame, but I admit that I'm biased. I can never get enough of Gemma Arterton.

The film's biggest fault is that it's even less saucy than the first film. It presents the pure chaos of wild schoolgirls, but there are only the slightest hints of sexuality. Where's Frankie Howerd when we need him? The film's greatest strength is David Tennant. I don't think I've ever seen him in any role where his presence doesn't elevate the quality of an otherwise mediocre film.

This is what Liverpool Station in London looked like before the Coronavirus lockdown. Those were the good old days. I'd be dancing in the middle of them. How many of you can spot Jodie Whittaker in the picture? It's easy if you've seen the film, but almost impossible if you haven't.

	Order from Amazon.com
	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

St. Trinian's (4 Stars)

The last time I watched this film I only gave it three stars. That was unfair. It's a better film than that. I think I penalised the film because it wasn't what I expected. The original St. Trinian's films, especially the ones made in the 1960's, were saucy, with a lot of sexual innuendo. The 2007 St. Trinian's girls are bad girls, but not in a sexual way, apart from occasional short skirts,. There's only one hint of sexuality in an early scene, when a half naked boy runs out of the school after a party.

In a manner reminiscent of American high school movies, the girls are divided into their tribes: the Chavs, the Emos, the Geeks and the Posh Totties. There aren't any real Mean Girls in the school, even if the Posh Totties look like them. The girls in the school aren't mean to one another, they stand united against the rest of the world. Well, they're mean to the New Girl, Annabelle Fritton, but it's just a test to see if she's worthy of joining the school. After surviving two days of humiliation she's accepted as one of the girls.

Maybe another reason for my low rating last time is the casting of a man, Rupert Everett, as the school's headmistress. I don't like to see men dressing up as women, even less than women dressing up as men, but I can understand the reason. In the original films a man was also cast as the headmistress. I'll try to close my eyes to it.

And one last criticism which I even mentioned in my last review is that Gemma Arteron isn't given a chance to look sexy. She wears a long skirt and looks almost (but not quite) goth. That's a disappointment that I have to get over. This was her first film, and at 21 it was her last chance to appear as a schoolgirl.

The film's glamour is provided by the Posh Totties, Chloe, Chelsea and Peaches. Do they really call girls Peaches? They're not such bad girls. They like to pray.

And they pray more than once in the film.

But I have to admit, if I were their teacher I'd be looking up their skirts in every lesson. I'd try to resist the temptation, but it would be much too hard.

Is it just me, or do the girls look even hotter with glasses?

Take another look. Tell me what you think.

Yes, that's Jodie Whittaker flirting with Stephen Fry. She won't get very far. Doesn't she know he's gay? She needs to try again after she's regenerated as a man.

I'll probably rewatch the sequel to this film in the next few days. Probably. I'm not going to promise, because I break my promises too often. I also want to rewatch the original five St. Trinian's films. It must be at least 40 years since I last saw them. It's time for some 1950's and 1960's nostalgia.

Success Rate:  + 2.2

	Order from Amazon.com
	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

St. Trinian's 2: The Legend of Fritton's Gold (4 Stars)

This is the second film in the rebooted St. Trinian's franchise. It takes place one year after the previous film and begins on the first day of the school year as the girl's arrive at the school. Kelly Jones, the head girl in the previous film, played by Gemma Arterton, has now left the school and joined MI7. It's a British Secret Intelligence agency that specialises in carrying out illegal operations that are in the national interest. The end justifies the means. The organisation is so secret that not even MI6 knows it exists. Kelly returns briefly to help her old school friends.

So who's the new head girl? None other than Annabelle Fritton, who joined the school in the last film. It helps being related to the headmistress.

David Tennant is the dastardly evil bad guy in this film. He does it so well. He plays Sir Piers Pomfrey, the leader of AD1, a secret organisation that is dedicated to resist feminism and keep women subjugated. "Women are for making cakes and babies", as Sir Pomfrey eloquently describes his agenda. The organisation was founded in 1559 as a reaction to Elisabeth becoming the Queen of England, and it has existed ever since. Now his path crosses with St. Trinian's, because he wants to find the gold hidden by Miss Fritton's ancestor, a notorious pirate.

David Tennant wears a purple robe for his role. That's very appropriate.

If a pompous, evil, sexist man wants to suppress womankind, there's only one solution. A gang of schoolgirls have to cut him down to size, and which schoolgirls can fight better than the bad girls of St. Trinian's?

Despite being less of a success with the public, I find this film much better than the last film. Battle of the Sexes films are always enjoyable, because we know from the beginning who will win. What I also like about this film is that it concentrates on the older schoolgirls, the sixth form girls. There are only brief scenes with the younger girls.

And guess who plays the school's oddball receptionist!

Because of its failure at the box office it's unlikely that another sequel will be made. That's a shame. It was fun while it lasted. Maybe there will be another reboot one day, with even sexier schoolgirls.

I'n curious why it was never released in America. Were there too many complaints about sexualising underage schoolgirls in the first film? If you check the bios of the cast you'll see that the fifth and sixth form girls, supposedly aged 15 to 18, were played by actresses in their twenties. The members of the pop group Girls Aloud appear in both films. They look a lot better than they sing.

	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

St. Trinian's (3 Stars)

It's been almost 10 years since I first watched this film. I didn't know what to make of it then, and I don't know what to make of it now.

Four films were made about St. Trinian's Girls School from 1954 to 1966. After a long pause a fifth film was made in 1980. The first five films followed a logical continuity. Now, in 2007, the St. Trinian's franchise has been rebooted. The spirit of the early films has been revived. It's all about naughty girls. The older girls (16 to 18) are sexually provocative, the younger girls (11 to 13) are mischievous, and there's a grey zone in between.

The school is shown through the eyes of Annabelle Fritton, a new girl who arrives in the school at the start of the term. She's the niece of the school's headmistress, but that doesn't give her any advantages. She's shocked by the chaos and lack of discipline in the school, but as she settles in she gives up and becomes like the other girls.

The main plot of the film is that the school is facing bankruptcy. St. Trinian's is £500,000 in debt. Not even the money from the sale of the illegal vodka that the girls make in the cellar is enough to save the school. There's only one solution. They decide to steal a painting from the National Gallery in London and sell it to an art dealer. Bad girls!

I would have expected Kelly Jones, the head girl, to be the sexiest girl in school, since she's played by Gemma Arterton. Somehow she looks too plain, too goth and too pale. She doesn't even wear a short skirt.

This is the most we get to see of her. No, it isn't a short skirt, it's just the way she's sitting.

What sort of girls school lets a man pose naked for the art class? I couldn't do it. I'd be too afraid that I might have an embarrassing "problem".

Here are a few girls, from the youngest to the oldest. Do you see what I mean about Gemma Arterton's skirt being too long?

So why don't I like the film? For me it's too much of a contrast. I like the idea of sexy schoolgirls, but the presence of too many very young girls is a turn off. If it were just about older schoolgirls it would be an erotic fantasy, if it were just about younger schoolgirls I could treat it as a comedy, but mixing the two side by side in the same scenes is disturbing.

	Order from Amazon.com
	Order from Amazon.co.uk
	Order from Amazon.de

A Royal Night Out (4 Stars)

This was one of my top 10 films that I saw in the cinema in 2015. To be honest, I don't know why I'm only giving it four stars. Maybe I'm ashamed to say how much I like it? It's such a beautiful story of a day in the life of the two princesses, Elizabeth and Margaret, one of whom has since gone on to be the longest ruling British monarch.

I can't help wondering if the director approached the Queen to ask for permission to make the film. After all, it seems to be taking quite a liberty, telling false stories about the ruling monarch. Nevertheless, she's portrayed respectfully. She makes mistakes in her childish innocence – she was 19 at the time, but immature due to being sheltered from the world – but she always conducts herself as a lady. Her 14-year-old sister Margaret acts wilder, but that's what the real Margaret was like in her younger years. I wonder if Margaret really called herself P2 ("Princess Two"). That's amusing.

The film shows that the worst of rogues, such as the owners of a Soho brothel, treat the royal family with the greatest of respect. To be British is to respect the monarchy. That's something that the current leader of the Labour party, Jeremy Corbyn, has never learnt. He disrespectfully refuses to sing the national anthem, "God save the Queen". He doesn't deserve to lead a political party. He's a traitor who doesn't even deserve to live in our country. He should be beat up and dumped in an alley where he can reconsider his opinions.

A Royal Night Out (4 Stars)

This is a delightful little comedy inspired by true events. The story is highly speculative, bearing little resemblance to the official records of this event, but it plants a seed of doubt in our mind at the end, when Elizabeth says, "Don't let the truth come out. If anyone asks we were at the Ritz".

The story is about the two English princesses, Elizabeth, 19, who has since become Queen Elizabeth, and her 14-year-old sister Margaret. The Second World War is over, in Europe at least, and they want to go out and celebrate with the people of London on VE Day, May 8th, 1945. After pleading with their parents they are allowed to go out with two army officers as chaperones, but there are strict instructions that they should return by 1 am.

Of course, girls will be girls, and the two princesses soon escape from their boring chaperones. The two girls are separated. Elizabeth finds company with Jack, an airman who is a perfect gentleman and protects her wherever they go, even though he doesn't recognise who she is. Margaret is less lucky and gets together with a rather creepy naval officer who obviously has sexual intentions with her, despite her young age. He gets her drunk and takes her to a brothel, but she runs away from him and finds protection from the brothel's owner when she reveals her identity.

The forbidden romance between Elizabeth and Jack is both touching and amusing. They both know it can never come to anything, so the most they share is a single kiss, which is discreetly off camera. I wonder. If the story really were true, would Elizabeth regret giving Jack up for Philip of Greece?