Tragedy Girls (5 Stars)

Dancer's Top Films #69

I can't help heaping praise on this film. It's the best teen slasher film for 20 years. It's the first teen slasher film of the social media generation. It's truly unique, bringing new ideas into the teen slasher genre. Added to that, the two actresses in the title roles, Alexandra Shipp and Brianna Hildebrand, are nothing short of stunning. They were born to be the Tragedy Girls.

I fear that not many people have seen the film. It was intended to be released direct-to-video, but the distribution rights were acquired by Gunpowder & Sky, a company that specialises in direct-to-streaming films. Have you never heard of the company? That's hardly surprising. It doesn't have a subscription-based website. It sells films individually to be streamed, primarily on mobile phones. Wow! Could standards sink any lower? Fortunately, the film is now available from Amazon as a Blu-ray manufactured-on-demand disc. That's better than nothing, although I've heard rumours that MOD Blu-rays only have an expected life of 10 years. I hope the rumours are false.

Like all good teen slasher films, the final scene takes place at the school prom. These romantic words whispered by Jordan Welch to his prom date sound like they came directly from an episode of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". The words are spoken too soon. He doesn't survive until the end of the evening. He should have known that his girlfriend is the serial killer that has been terrorising the town. Before the night is over there are 124 dead bodies. Who said that girls can't do it just as well as boys?

Sadie Cunningham (left) and McKayla Hooper (right) are the deadliest cheerleaders ever. But what sort of name is McKayla anyway? I'd never heard it as a Christian name before this film, but evidently it's a relatively popular name for girls in America.

The social media aspect is important in the film. The two girls have a Twitter page and a blog in which they write about serial killers. Their main motive for killing is to increase their popularity by writing exclusive reports about new murders. Should I do something like that to get more readers? I currently have 18,000 readers a month, which is nothing in the global scheme of things. What can I do to get 150,000 readers a month? Who do I need to kill?

That's just a dream. I've never killed anyone all my life, and I'm too old to start now. It's even less than a dream. I fantasise about being killed, not killing someone else. I guess my blog will never be a big success.